There are days when I see a few of the other guys in the office mindlessly rifling through Tinder messages from godless whores or whatever, and I get jealous that I've gone and married off. But then there are days like this when sex-disease bombs drop and I'm like "Nah, I'm good. I'm totally fine looking back at my record and knowing I left it all behind completely unscathed. My dick looks marvelous." But all you single cock-slinging mother fuckers, you've got some shit to worry about. Super Gonorrhea is here and its taking prisoners.
According to the DailyMail:
Gonorrhoea has been classified as an urgent public-health threat in the United States after it has grown drug-resistant.
At least 2 million people in the United States develop serious bacterial infections that are resistant to one or more types of antibiotics each year, and at least 23,000 die from the infections, according to a new report.
They also include diaorrhea-causing superbug C difficile and a fast-growing killer 'nightmare' bacteria dubbed a known as CRE.
It comes as experts warn we are fast approaching a 'post anti-biotic era' where the 'cushion of drugs' to protect us against diseases is gone.
Overprescribing of antibiotics has been held to blame for the increase in drug resistance.
Experts say it allows pathogens the opportunity to outwit the drugs used to treat them.
And only a handful of new antibiotics have been developed and brought to market in the past few decades, with only a few companies working on drugs to replace them.
Dr Thomas Frieden, director of the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), which released the report, said: 'For organism after organism, we're seeing this steady increase in resistance rates.
The disease is increasingly becoming resistant to tetracycline, cefixime, ceftriaxone and azithromycin - formerly the most successful treatments for the disease.
Gonorrohea is especially troublesome because it is easily spread, and infections are easily missed.
In the United States, there are approximately 300,000 reported cases, but because infected people often have no symptoms the CDC estimates the actual number of cases is closer to 820,000.
If left untreated, gonorrhea can lead to pelvic inflammatory disease, ectopic pregnancy, stillbirths, severe eye infections in babies and infertility in men and women.
I don't even know what it is, but pelvic inflammatory disease sounds AWESOME.