Life
by Fitz E Fresh on February 20, 2013

Q: How DTF are girls when they visit other schools? I go to a large, well-known party school about 700 miles away from my home. One of my great girl friends here is hosting one of her hot friends from home next weekend. My friend has given me the green light to hit on her and even told me her friend thinks I'm cute. So can I make this work and if so how knowing I'll most likely never hangout with this girl again?  Do you think she shared that information in a positive way or gave a warning that I intend to get this slampiece in the sack?

A: On a scale from one to Willing, said out-of-towners are available as all hell. Visiting other colleges is the equivalent of a get out of jail free pass; except for hookups rather than Monopoly. Letting your guard down comes naturally when you're entering a presumably exciting environment where you have an anonymous role in the social ladder for one weekend. So in short, your chances are good. It sounds like your friend has done some commendable wingwoman work by trying to set it up for you, but remember that she's fair game rather than marked territory- and other dudes will be smelling that fresh meat as well. Make an early impact by being super welcoming and providing her with a comfort zone and you should be able to hoist a leg up. The last thing I'd worry about is you guys seeing each other again; everyone knows how slim those odds are, so ride it out.

Q: Long story short, I'm now dating a girl who I was previously just hooking up with. Even though this just started, I already want it to end. I like her and care about her as a person, but I don't want to hurt her feelings (I realize this is impossible). What do you think is the easiest way to let her down?

A: Rip that band-aid, breau. If it's truly how you feel, don't think about it for one more second – end it before she has another day to become more vulnerable and/or attached to what has become her disinterested boyfriend. An easy (relatively speaking) explanation is that things got more serious than what you're looking for in a relationship and you don't want to lead her on anymore. Short, sweet, to the point and relatively honest. IF things just started it won't be too painful.

Every breakup sucks and feelings will be hurt, but nothing is worse than sipping on the rancid milk of an expired relationship. 

Q: My best friend is a girl who dated my old roommate for about 2 months then broke up. We  all still hang out all the time and the girl and I have become legit best friends. I am really starting to like her and I don't know what to do. She gives signs that she likes me when we're out alone like holding my hand and stuff but I can never determine if I should act on it. What's the move?

A: Careful of the old “hand hold” young breau. Sure it's used in intimate relationships; but be advised that from a girl's perspective, it's also a gesture that can fall safely under the jurisdiction of the Friend Zone. And god knows that's not where you're trying to be. That said, overlapping friends/relationships is dicey but happens; and if navigated properly it can be executed with success. A two month relationship is fairly inconsequential to infringe upon, but I'd still talk it out with the bromate before making any actual moves. Don't jump the gun entirely, but also don't spend a year writhing around in a lovesick haze. If you feel things developing just ask her if she feels the same way. Let her know that you're having a hard time reading the signs and just want to make sure you're doing it right.

Q: So, I started hooking up with this guy and actually really like him. He can get it up, he just doesn't stay hard. I've tried multiple nights and there's nothing going on down there. What's the best way to approach the situation because I do really like him, but I do want to have sex.

A: As a girl, that truly is the fucking worst. You're wondering if it's you, if it's him, or if he's just completely blacked out. And on top if it all, it's just fucking awkward. If this was a one-time thing I'd be inclined to chalk it up to nerves, or whiskey, but the fact that it's become the norm raises some questions. You don't want to waste any more of your sexual youth trying to pump some blood into this budding relationship, and his cock, but if you like him it may be worth trying to sort through the issue. The next time you hook up make sure you're sober– yes, I know this isn't always ideal but could be a solution. Wear your sexiest panties, negate any potential distractions (loud roommates, TV, significant sports games) and bring your fucking A game when you hit the sack. If the road bump of flaccidity persists and you're still into him, you gotta bring it up. Ask him if there's anything wrong and anything you can do. From that point you've really given it your all; which I solute you for, because god knows I don't have that sort of patience.

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