If there's one thing we learned as bloggers, it's that the four-ingredient recipe for a top-notch fight video is about as simple as whipping up a good gin and tonic: All you need is a plentiful amount of booze, some sort of conflict over nothing in particular, a camera phone, and YouTube. As soon as it hits YouTube, it's eye-witness entertainment for all the world to consume. Now that everyone's sobered up and settled down from the inebriated antics of Mardi Gras, there's a ripe, bountiful crop of fresh fight videos for the pickin'. Here are our five favorite videos of people coming to blows during Mardi Gras 2011.
1. Drunk Dude vs. Bouncer
Premise: This is just priceless. A drunk dude and his possibly drunker girlfriend starts shit with a Bourbon Street bouncer. Guess what happens? You're a confirmed idiot if you start shit with a bouncer and think you can get away with it. The bouncer forces the dude to kiss the sidewalk and gets arrested. The girlfriend joins her sweetheart lovingly in braclets, with an all expenses-paid honeymoon to the NOLA drunk tank.
2. Huge Dudes vs. Huge Dudes
Premise: Some whiny chick instigates a brawl in an Austin (we think) bar during Mardi Gras. Shit gets real when three huge dudes start pummeling each other.
3. Mardi Gras Revelers vs. Mardi Gras Protesters
Premise: A bunch of revelers on Bourbon Street decide to take on the no-fun club that shows up every year to preach to everyone about how sinful and shameful their hedonistic activities are. The resulting altercation is quite an amusing spectacle.
4. Chicks with Beads vs. Chicks with Beads, Part I
Premise: Just two chicks clobbering each other on the street while a group of on-lookers gathers around and watches like it's a shady third-world cockfight.
5. Chicks with Beads vs. Chicks with Beads, Part 2
Premise: An even better video of two chicks in fistcuffs, with the crowd going bonkers. This time the chicks are rolling on the ground, kicking each other with the heels of their boots and pulling each other's hair out. Seriously. According to the YouTube uploader (the same as the previous chick fight, natch), "Here's another cat fight fight only like 30 feet from where the first one happened, this is by Superior Grill. Look at her hair on the ground at the end." That's right, pay attention folks, this one is a dandy. Pretty sure I see some LSU purple and gold on the one babe, but it's Mardi Gras, so who the hell knows. Stay classy, southern belles.