by J. Camm on July 9, 2014


Forget whatever music they’re feeding Guantanamo detainees, if I were imprisoned and you put this video on loop and forced me to watch it, I’d find a way t0 fucking kill myself. Almost immediately, too. I don’t care if you take everything harmful away from me — shoelaces, belt, whatever — I’d still get it done.

I don’t know what happened between the time Micro Machines fell out of style and now, but this was torture to watch. This lady can speak up to 11 words per second (and hey, more power to her because by the grace of God, talking fast is how she makes her living), but even her toned down version of fast talking is tearing the ass out of me. Sexy shoulder pads in that blazer, though. Daddy’s hot for those.

J. Camm

About J. Camm...

J. Camm is the Managing Editor of BroBible. He is a graduate of the University of Miami thanks mostly in part to a world-class short-term memory. When not writing drivel on the Internet, J.Camm enjoys golf and the inexplicable satisfaction that comes with forgetting a person's name the exact instant he meets them.