Farrah Abraham Is Single Again So Now’s Your Chance To Run To The Hills And Hide Before She Sinks Her Claws Into You

Farrah Abraham is like a car accident on the side of the road — as you drive by you can’t help but to stare, and if you’re particularly unlucky you’ll wind up in a wreck of your own because driving under the speed limit to gawk will more likely than not get you rear-ended. So now that Farrah Abraham is single, make sure not to stop and stare. She might hook her claws into you and drag you around with her.

The last guy somehow managed to escape their relationship still alive, which is an impressive feat considering that they were dating for a few months, aka a few months more than I would ever expect anyone to date Farrah Abraham. Then again, I’m only assuming he’s alive because she tweeted this at him on National Ex Day:

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There’s always the possibility that she tweeted at him to keep up the appearance that she actually hadn’t devoured his soul and used his flesh to fertilize her garden, but I’m not journalist. I’m just here to be a douche.

Tl;dr: if you see Farrah Abraham anytime in the near future…run. RUN FOR YOUR LIFE.