Keep Those Socks On
There are few things that will kill a boner faster than a gorgeous naked woman clad only in some tube socks. True bros can muscle through this travesty for the purpose of the bang and it's a good thing. A research study shows that wearing socks helped 80% of the couples achieve orgasm compared to 50% that went barefoot. The writer of this article can achieve release even if the chick is in a snuggie with access to only the vagina.
Electrify Your Woman's Brain if You Can
When you think of the 1950s, super sexy time isn't exactly what comes to mind. It was one of the most sexually repressed times in human history. One Tulane University professor who was obviously a bro worked around these lame times to research the female finale. During his experiments, he zapped a chick's brain with electricity in a certain spot which resulted in a 30 minute orgasm. Plenty of time to make several hot pockets then come back for round two!
Orgasms and Heroin Have The Same Effect on The Noggin
Heroin is bad. The verdict is in on that one. Orgasms are freakin' sweet and the verdict is in on that one. Oddly enough scientists found that the brain releases so much dopamine during orgasms that it resembles a brain on heroin. Instead of being a homeless junky, just jerk it instead! World wide heroin addiction solved!
3 Orgasms Per Week Can Save Your Life
3 orgasms per week is a very low number for bros. I know that if I orgasm less than 180 times in a week, I'm in a seriously salty mood. Turns out that at least 3 orgasms per week can help reduce your risk of heart attack and stroke by 50 percent, unless of course your sexual escapades are so freaky, scary and dangerous that they could actually kill you!
Sucks To Be A Honey Bee
Our honey bee bros have a very dark cloud over their sexy times. These poor bastards, like true bros can't wait to blow a load. The problem is that when they do it… their testicles literally explode and they die shortly after. Poor buzzing little bastards!
Women Can Orgasm During Core Exercise
Getting a chick off can be tricky. There are bros, like me out there that have dedicated themselves to the study of learning tricks of the trade when making a girl reach the big moment. Nature slaps all of our hard work in the face, since it turns out some women can attain orgasm by simply exercising their core. That's why I finish first, then immediately throw a medicine ball at my lady friend.
The Secret Titty Combination
Know that as you travel through this world smashing vag after vag, there are some women out there that only require breast stimulation. 1 percent of women on this planet can actually reach orgasm just through some motorboaty goodness. Give it a try sometime!
Einstein Was Truly a Bro
Einstein was not only a genius that brought us the theory of relativity, but he was also a goddamn bro. He spent 10 days of research working on a “sex box” that could capture the awesome energy of an orgasm. I imagine it was like that box in the “Hellraiser” movie franchise, but instead of demons… there was bodily fluids in there.
Check out Andy Green every Monday on 101 WRIF's Dave and Chuck The Freak!