In order to make the Top 5 Hottie index, the celebrity, athlete, or other notable hottie in question needs to be relevant at this moment and tearing up the headlines. Just because you're hot isn't enough. You need to be in the news.
5. Ines Sainz
In case you live under a rock, Mexico's sexy Azteca football correspondent was allegedly catcalled by members of the Jets while trying to get an exclusive interview with Mark Sanchez. The hullabaloo was the off-the-field media sensation of the week, prompting an NFL investigation and a macro discussion about whether or not smokeshow sideline reporters are a distraction in the locker room and on the sidelines. Basically, it all amounted to a lot of bullshit over nothing. Exhibit A: Study the Twitpic above, which comes from the same day as the alleged incident, and tell me if you think Sainz's booty wouldn't be distracting while sweating your ass off during a five-yard backpedal drill.
4. Blake Lively
"The Town" hit theaters this weekend and easily won the box office. The critically-acclaimed Beantown naroco-thriller co-stars Blake Lively, who plays Krista Coughlin, a sexy and sl*tty single mom who moonlights as a drug mule to pay the bills. Back in July, she described her performance to Total Film magazine: "I'm screaming, I'm crying, I'm fighting, I'm on drugs, I'm in the hospital. They were all very, very rough. Rough to perform, rough to watch or to experience." Bitching and moaning isn't typically criteria to make the Top Five hotties list, but I'll make an exception for anyone as hot as Lively.
3. Rebecca Hall
This brunette cutie landed on everyone's radar with "Vicky Cristina Barcelona." Now she's back in "The Town" starring alongside Ben Affleck and Jon Hamm.
2. Coco Nicole Austin
Last week, Ice T's significant other strut her super-sized badonkadonk down a runaway for New York City's Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week. Pompous, highfalutin' fashion is about as interesting to me as watching Spackle dry, so I really could care less about the event itself. However, I most definitely do care about the new photos of her massive whaletail, which make Moby-Dick look like a docile guppy swimming in a please-touch tank at Sea World. So call me Ishmael, it gets better. A few days after the fashion show, Coco blast out a Tweet of her posing in a thong with her sister. As you can tell, it runs in the family. If there's one thing I'll never complain about, it's a g-string peeker. Bonus points when there's hot sisters involved.
1. Emma Stone
If you have a pulse, you fell in love with Emma the first time you saw "Superbad." Your infatuation with her cattiness and wry personality was probably re-kindled last fall with "Zombieland." Now this red-headed up-and-comer is back at the multiplex for "Easy A," starring as a high school hussy who offers an uncanny "service." Critics agreed though that even though it was marketed as yet another teen comedy about dorks struggling to lose their virginity, it's actually has a much sharper script than that. So if your girlfriend wants to drag you to it on a random Tuesday night, don't protest too much and just remember how hot Stone is.