Right off the bat I'm going to clear any silly misconception that the reason you shouldn't delete the following people is for any reason other than the fact that they're overflowing with unintentional humor. That's it. Nope, nothing like "The geek from 10th grade might grow up to cure cancer one day", but more along the lines of "The geek from 10th grade posts weird statuses where everything is spelled wrong". I not only Facebook stalk the hell out of these people like a lion on the prowl for a zebra, but I get addicted. As in every couple days I check in to see how lucky I am that I'm not one of these people and then wonder what it's like to go through life having their point of view of things. You'll get what I mean in a minute, so for starters...
1. The Ones Who Graduated High School And Do Nothing
There are nights where I stay up until 3 A.M. writing essays, and mornings where I decide that leftover cheese fries are just as nutritious as any balanced breakfast and eat them on the way to class. This is my life as the average college student, but what is it like to still be living in your parents' house after graduation and be unemployed? I'm looking at my Facebook right now and one of these kids has 220 tagged photos, and 219 of them are cars. Is that what the average kid who didn't choose to go to college does? Take photos of cars? If I told my parents "Hey guys, instead of going for a Bachelor's degree I wanna sit around in the Walmart parking lot down the street and smoke cigarettes on a daily basis, then maybe go to school to be a mechanic and then complain about how it's too hard and just talk about cars 24/7 instead" when they asked me what my post-High School plans were, I would've been chained to a post in the backyard and left for dead.
2. The Ones Who Are Now Theater Majors
Not all Theater Majors are weird, just something like 85% which is a factual statistic that I just made up. With this in mind, that means that most of the theater kids you're friends with are probably socially retarded to a degree, which also means that they post things that should never be posted. For example, this popped up on my newsfeed the other day:
"I just got prescribed eyelash shampoo for eye related acne, did anyone else know this is a thing?"
First of all, that doesn't deserve to be public knowledge, not only because no one wants to know that but because no one needs to know the current state of how unfortunate your face currently is. Please also take note of the discussion prompting "did anyone else know this is a thing", as if the people who do would be willing to admit it and like anyone else on Earth except for this person wants to have a deep soul-searching conversation about eye zits.