Last week David Koechner a.k.a. Champ from Anchorman swung by our NYC office. He was there to wish us a Happy Thanksgetting, which is a cool promo Verizon is doing today to make the worst travel day of the year a little less stressful. Verizon is giving away free music and ebooks for your devices with Amazon, iTunes, and Pandora. They’re also giving away Lyft ride coupons and free airport and airline wifi, even if you’re not a Verizon customer.
Since going home for the holidays meaning jumping on Tinder to see who from high school is still single and ready to mingle (*fingers-crossed it’s Chelsea from chemistry class), Koechner broke down amusing Tinder conversations we’ve posted here on BroBible in the past year.
Let’s start with Koechner’s take on Netflix and Chill. It’s a real whammy.
David Koechner: “Well, he’s not serious about grammar. And doesn’t watching Netflix together imply chilling? These people don’t know how to spell and this guy looks like he’s going to prison.”
BroBible: Netflix and chill is like the new way to say you’re hooking up…
Koechner: Yeah, I know! But it’s implied. If you’re going to watch Netflix, you’re going to chill. Like.. “Netflix and chillll brah?” YEAH. That’s just what happens.
David Koechner: She thought about picking the third one for a while. I don’t know if she’s being facetious, but the point is that they’re communicating. She wants to play a game? I’ll give you something away for free — Today, Wednesday the 25th, Verizon is giving away downloads of movies, ebooks, and rides for the worst travel day of the year. Who doesn’t like free? Go sign up for it at Verizon.com/Thanksgetting. If you need a ride to the airport, they’ll get you a free ride with Lyft. And they’re offering free Internet at airports and on planes.
David Koechner: She was up late! 1:44! Goddess of love and beauty? PLAY-ER. I hope you two hook-up and bore people for years.
David Koechner: Sounds like it’s going to be weird when you say “I don’t want to make this weird.” Do hot dog fingers end a relationship or begin a relationship? I’ve often said this to young ladies .”If I bought you a corndog, can I watch you eat it? — It’s just food. Don’t make it dirty, bro.