When you’re single you should be reluctant to commit to one girl until she has proven that she is a worthy partner. It’s obvious that most women will never be worthy of you and, that’s why it’s a fantastic idea to date a lot of women casually and non-exclusively until you eventually find the right one.
A lot of men make the mistake of dating a small amount of girls exclusively which eventually leads to marrying one of them and then turning their life into a big pile of sh*t. It happens simply because most men are never willing to explore their true potential.
This, in my opinion, is why a man should date a lot of beautiful women before he settles down. Because when he does find the right one, he really knows (has the facts) she’s worth it.
So, how should you go about dating more than one woman? It’s a lot easier than most men think but, here are 10 things you need to know that will help you out.
1. Clear things from the very beginning
If you don’t establish some clear boundaries at the beginning, these women will class you as unfaithful, even if you never agreed to have a “relationship”. If you put your cards on the table they won’t be able to justify their anger after seeing you with other girls because they chose to date you under the conditions discussed at the beginning of the “relationship”.
These days more and more women do not expect you to jump into a serious relationship (good news) so I would say it’s quite common for them to eventually agree on entering a casual, non-committed arrangement.
The only downside is the fact that it’s pretty rare for casual relationships to go on for very long; eventually somebody will start having feelings and desires of intimacy. That’s why it’s paramount to stick to the initial boundaries if you want to avoid entering a relationship that you didn’t want in the first place.
2. Safe sex for the win
I don’t want to give any lessons on safe sex here but it’s a very important issue that has some serious health and life changing implications. If you’re in a committed relationship with a woman, it’s normal to have her go on the pill and have unprotected sex.
If you’re with more than one woman chances of catching a nasty STD are quite high. If you somehow manage to elude that, it’s only a matter of time until you get one pregnant and that will be the end of your game. Play it cool, be intelligent about it and you can continue the fun for as long as you like.
3. Keep the romantic dates to a minimum
Although you made everything clear from the beginning, if you start having romantic dates with any of these women they are bound to get the wrong idea. It’s great to work on keeping the girls interested but the moment one of the falls in love with you its game over. The more you spend on romantic dates, the more she thinks that you’re looking for something other than casual fun.
To keep seeing more than one woman make sure you keep the dates casual and modest, this way there’s never going to be any confusion.
4. Don’t spend the night together
It’s vital that whatever happens or how inconvenient it might seem you should never spend the night together. Once this happens you’re basically asking her to have a relationship.
First it happens once, then more and more until it becomes a routine and she sleeping at your place all the time. The best way to avoid this is to never let it happen in the first place.
If you did good at the begging and created this “f*ck buddy” relationship then asking her to leave, or leaving yourself shouldn’t be a problem. If things seem more difficult just come up with a bad excuse that you either have something important in the morning or you can’t sleep well with another person. Either way she’s probably not going to believe you but at least it might work. Women hate being used and you need to make her less aware of the fact that you’re doing exactly that.
5. Show your appreciation
You want your arrangements to work for as long as they can and in order to do this you still need to show every one of these girls that they are special and that you appreciate them for what they are. This is a good way of showing her that you’re not just using her for sex but in fact you like being in her company. Make sure you don’t confuse this with telling her that you love her as that will only mess everything up.
Make sure you tell her that you consider her a good friend, this will allow her to justify the relationship to her friends and you must know what an important role her friends play in all of this. You guys are just friends with benefits and there’s nothing wrong in you sleeping with other women.
If she puts the boyfriend tag on you, then you’ll become a lying, cheating and manipulative son of a b*tch. Avoid this by clarifying the nature of your relationship from the very beginning.
6. Keep your head down and play it cool
When most guys start seeing more then one woman their whole world lights up. They feel like their some sort of super alpha male that nobody can touch. Women will spot this a mile away and if they feel that you’re taking them for granted they’ll do everything they can to take you off your pedestal.
Don’t go bragging to everyone of how big of a player you are, that will always come back to bite you in the ass and it will also put off all other potentials.
Be modest and discreet about everything, this is the key to maintaining a casual sex relationship.
7. No jealousy
You need to be very honest with yourself here, if you’re having sex with more women do you think the girls won’t want to have their options open too?
If you want to take complete ownership of a girl then you’re going to have to step into a serious relationship, unless you’re some sort of Arabian rich guy.
It’s also important to mention that the moment a woman senses some sort of jealousy towards another man she knows that you see him as a worthy adversary and want to know why that’s happening. It also shows her that you have feelings for her and again will try to lure you into a relationship.
Jealousy could also have an opposite reaction, “how dare you! When you’re sleeping with these other women and I’m not saying anything” – this will class you as a hypocrite and she will lose a lot of respect for you.
Whatever happens, NEVER show jealousy to any of the women you are seeing!
8. No nesting
By nature, women are nesters. They will purposefully leave their stuff at the houses of men they are interested in having a committed relationship with. It usually starts off with a toothbrush and some hair ties and eventually leads to a mortgage and 2 ugly babies.
Items left behind are also a warning to other women. If they see things around your house they will immediately think that you’re cheating and this will make them very reluctant in getting down to do the horizontal folk dance.
These belongings also provide women with an excuse to come back and see you and quite often we won’t really want to see them again, especially if they were bad in the sack.
To avoid this, before she leaves make sure you ask her if she left anything behind, if she says no, do a quick sweep and bring back anything that you find.
Finally, don’t forget about the sheets. There are all sorts of girly things that get left behind, especially if things got a little messy.
9. Don’t remind her of your situation
Because of your original arrangement, she’s probably already suspecting that you’re seeing other women. There’s no reason why you should be bringing this up for discussion.
Make it a rule that when you are with one woman, you never ever speak about the others. If she asks (and she will) try to be as quick and discreet as possible. The moment she asks you’ll find yourself discussing the terms of the relationship again, if you’re not honest about what’s going on you’ll find yourself in a relationship with terms that you don’t really want.
Whenever I was with a girl that was NOT seeing anyone else, even though we discussed it from the beginning, when the topic comes up she will either feel offended or say that it’s unfair for you to be having fun while she isn’t. This will usually result in 2 possible outcomes, 1 she wants you to start a committed relationship and 2 she will make it her mission to see other men.
That’s why the secret behind it all is to NEVER mention it after the initial discussion. This way she will continue with your relationship terms and remain blissfully ignorant of your relations with the other women.
10. Don’t take things too seriously
When you’re dating a lot of beautiful women, simultaneously, it’s only natural to have your head way above the clouds. It’s important to remember that these women are not your possessions and the moment you start treating them as such you will lose them.
You are nothing more but a friend that they have sex with. Until you step into a committed relationship or actually make a proposal you’ll have no rightful ownership of one particular woman. They have other friends for other things (dancing, movies, shopping etc) and you should be grateful that you’re the friend that get’s to sleep with them.
Don’t take things to seriously, you are supposed to be having fun, If you’re not having fun then you’re obviously doing something wrong. Also, if you ever meet a girl that you believe is truly special, think very carefully before you give her up for this lifestyle otherwise you’ll soon discover that regret, is a very nasty emotion.
This is the sort of stuff I discuss on my blog and in the free eBook I give out to all fellow bros. If you want to increase your success with women visit The Player Guide – a place where the “dating” mindset is thrown out the window in favor of more direct (and fruitful) methods of meeting and seducing women.