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Today in Millennial Self-Importance: Read My Feels on Brunch

Dad Deals With Creepy Teacher Texting His Daughter The Old Fashioned Way… Beats Him With Baseball Bat

By / 06.09.14

BaseballBatBlood-EFLCAfter a Maryland woman found some “emotionally inappropriate” texts between her 15-year-old daughter and a 42-year-old teacher, she made the reasonable decision of alerting the school. The teacher then made the unreasonable decision of trying to rectify the situation on his own by showing up at the family’s home. Granted, if you’re texting weird flirty shit with a 15-year-old girl, you’re probably not the best at judgment calls.

When he showed up, the girl’s dad was basically like, “hey, dude, get your creepy ass outta here before I beat your ass with this here baseball bat.” The teacher responded with a “it’s not what it looks like! My phone autocorrected ‘homework is due Wednesday,’ to ‘what color underwear are you wearing.'” Likely story, dickwad.

The dad followed-through on his threat and smacked the teacher upside the head with the baseball bat, sticking it to pedophiles everywhere. This heartwarming story gets even more heartwarminger on account of the dad not being charged with any type of assault since the teacher was trespassing on his property. Simply touching.

Unfortunately for all of us, there’s no video of the incident, but to give you guys an idea about what an attack with a baseball bat looks like, we’ve organized some of the best baseball bat melees below.

1.Why You Don’t Punch A Guy With a Baseball Bat

2. School Yard Baseball Bat Knockout

3. Boston Street Fight With Baseball Bat

4. Store Owner Thwarts Robbery With Baseball Bat

5. Savage: Kid Destroys Brother With Baseball Bat

[Story via ABC News]


TAGSassaultbat dadcreepdads fight
Brandon Cohen
About Brandon Cohen... Brandon Cohen was raised by Jew gypsies on the sleepy island of Manhattan, and went on to defy the odds by graduating from a four-year accredited university in Nashville, TN. He's a writer and aspiring street fight videographer. Back in 2008, Brandon talked to Amanda Bynes at a club in LA for over fifteen minutes.

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