Just one of the many reasons I have 0 desire to ever join the police force, crazy bitches tryna cut your neck open. Back in December 2012, Jennifer Berube and her husband John MacLean III (having numbers in your name doesn’t automatically make you classy, FYI) were arrested for attempting to use a stolen credit card. Regular shit, right? Big deal. Except, Mrs. Berube here was tripping BALLS on heroin and thought she heard her husband trying to hang himself in his holding cell.
In a bid to help, she slipped a Leatherman tool out of a hidden jacket pocket and attacked Officer Damon Nguyen with it.
Surveillance footage from inside the station house showed Berube grabbing Nguyen by the neck with a 2-inch blade in her hand before getting overpowered by several other officers.
Via NY Daily News
Yes, because the first thing you cut when someone is hanging themselves isn’t the rope, it’s the police officer minding his own business in the corner. Lucky for the cop, Berube only managed to cut near his jugular rather than slice his entire neck open, and he lived. However, since he didn’t die Berube was acquitted of attempted second-degree murder and only got attempted aggravated assault. Moral of the story? It’s not attempted murder if you only cut someone a little bit, because that makes any sense.
Check out the video below.