You know what makes New York City so fucking fantastic? For the right amount of money, you can find someone to do pretty much anything for you. If you’re rich enough, you never have to lift a goddamn finger in this city. Don’t have time to walk your dog? OK, well I bet that aspiring hipster comedian does. Do your laundry? LOL! We have wash-and-fold drop-off services on every block. Drop off a bag in the morning before work, pick it up at night. Go to the grocery store? HA! Ever hear of Fresh Direct? Want Ethiopian food when you’re drunk at 4 am? There’s literally 20 options on Seamless, all delivered to your door with a couple taps on your phone. If you think capitalism is as awesome as we do, New York City is paradise. Thus, it’s no surprise to us that one resourceful trust-fund New York Bro hit up Craigslist to find someone to break in a new pair of Rainbow flip-flops for him. I feel think man’s pain; The blisters that come with breaking in a pair of Rainbows suck, especially when you’re planning on raging in them during the Belmont this Saturday. In exchange for breaking in this man’s Rainbows, he’s offering some very Bro gear, including pastel polos and a Koozie from Robert’s Western World. Given his Fratagonia and Brooks Brothers speak, what are chances our Bro is a rich kid who went to Vandy? Very, very high. Gotta love the free market economy. Here’s the Craigslist ad: We interrupt to remind everyone that 230 Fifth blows, unless you’re into woo’ing bridge-and-tunnel sweethearts on Saturday nights. There is no doubt in my mind this Bro is an I-banking summer intern. Carry on, young one: He wants those Rainbows to look as pictured below. You have two days:
If you’re interested in his offer and his promise of used polos, hit him up here.
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