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Pray For Juggalos: Court Upholds FBI’s Classification Of Juggalos As A ‘Gang’

By / 07.10.14

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Juggalos and Juggalettes everywhere are flying their hatchetman flags at half-mast today, after a ruling by a U.S. District Judge upheld the FBI’s designation of Juggalos as a gang.

The Insane Clown Posse and a group of passionate Juggalos, filed a lawsuit stating that ever since the bogus designation, they’ve been unfairly targeted by police. The Juggalos claim that this is discrimination, and just because they dress or look a certain way, doesn’t mean they actually do anything violent or illegal. “We’ll keep fighting to clear the Juggalo family name,” Insane Clown Posse member, Violent J said in a statement after the ruling.

Maybe if you’re trying to prove you’re not violent, you shouldn’t have your community represented by Violent J? Perhaps outsource this one to a nice mid-Western lawyer named Larry.

The U.S. District Judge who ruled on the case was basically like, “sorry, dudes, but the FBI can call you whatever they want.” The FBI never actually states specific action to take in order to deal with Juggalos, it just classifies them as a gang, which is well within their right to do.

I think Juggalos got off super easy here. If I were the FBI, I would’ve called for the Gathering of the Juggalos to be turned into a makeshift internment camp, holding Juggalos there indefinitely for the betterment of society. Everyone attending the festival would have to stay there, subsisting solely on Faygo, fast food, and whip-its, i.e. exactly what they probably do now anyway.

Here is the press conference held by Violent J and Shaggy 2 Dope back in January, condemning the FBI’s actions-

Also, if you’ve never seen this amazing short documentary on Juggalos, stop everything and watch it immediately -


TAGSGangsInsane Clown PosseJuggalos
Brandon Cohen
About Brandon Cohen... Brandon Cohen was raised by Jew gypsies on the sleepy island of Manhattan, and went on to defy the odds by graduating from a four-year accredited university in Nashville, TN. He's a writer and aspiring street fight videographer. Back in 2008, Brandon talked to Amanda Bynes at a club in LA for over fifteen minutes.

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