I realize a guy fucked three chicks in one day (slow clap), but this is our first lesbian submission and it's got to take top billing.
So before I even begin my story – I am a lesbian, but majority of my crew is compiled of booze bag pussy pounding hockey bros. Anyways, one of the guys and myself decided to road trip it down to DC because what else do unemployed college grads do for fun? I knew a few biddies down there, one of which I’ve previously fucked before (we’ll call her Jane) and I knew as soon as I told her I was coming down she was already wet.
Getting to the good stuff, Jane’s family has a huge house outside DC and her parents are never around so just about every weekend there is an open house. The party is insane, from the booze, coke, weed, molly, and I don’t even know what else – everyone was pretty much blacking out left and right.
It wasn’t long before Jane was all over me, and it didn’t take that long to get in her bed either. This chick is an animal, some of the best sex I’ve ever had – no need for foreplay she just ripped my pants off and told me to sit on her face. After a good 15 minutes of the most heavenly cunnilingus and a face full of cum later, she wants me to get her strap on and “fuck her like a whore”. Without hesitation this “whore” was on all fours biting her headboard. Now here’s the messed up part, I knew she was bisexual, I clearly didn’t care, but what I didn’t know was that she had a boyfriend (maybe that’s where the fuck me like a whore came in). Her boyfriend ends up walking in on me strap boning his girlfriend silly – whoops.
Not stopping for anyone she pushed herself off of me and explained the situation – to the both of us, and proposed we both stuff her. With no opposition from either party, I continue to hit it from behind while she blew her boyfriend. It was awesome, and the first threesome I’ve ever had with a guy.
All in all, the night ended great, we both got to hit it, not to mention we DP’d the shit out of Jane. Don’t think she’ll be able to walk in a straight line ever again, but by far one of my best hook-up experiences ever.
Talks like a sailor, doesn't she? The thing I want to know is does she look like a sailor, or Ellen Degeneres, or is she one of those good-looking lez?
Let me start by saying that this is a long story and I have no idea how I got so lucky with this series of events. So this feat happened back in the summer after freshman year of college. I went far away from home for school, so it was always good to get back for summers with friends. Also, being home for the summer meant seeing the girls that I would long distance flirt with throughout the school year, just to keep me on their mind for future reference. Let me add in here that I obviously still lived at home at the time and my parents would work all day and go to bed early.
Ok, so one day I decided to hit up one of the girls that I had been keeping in touch with during school (let's call her “A”). A and I were texting late night (1:30 a.m.) to plan something to do the next day when, out of the blue, she suggests I sneak out and go over to her place right now. Obviously I do not turn down what I deem to be an open invitation to do the dirty deed in her parents' basement. Once I get there, she sneaks me in the back door and we instantly tip-toe to the basement. She's wearing this little nightie lingerie piece, looking slamming. It did not take long before both our clothes were off and I'm trying to muffle the moans that are coming out of this chick's mouth so we don't wake her parents. We do it front, back, and sideways all over her basement before I finish, clean up, and sneak back out.
I wake up next afternoon (part time job allowed me to basically be a bum) I get a text from this other girl (let's call her “B”) who I previously fooled around with, but didn't seal the deal, and she wants to know what I am up to for the day. I say nothing and she asks to go see a movie, so we meet at the movie theater and after the movie is finished she says why don't we go back to my house and go in the pool while her parents are at work. So we swim for a while with the usual flirting and such then go inside to dry off and change. Once we are inside, I change and go out of the bathroom to see B standing in the kitchen butt naked. Now, as an 18 year old guy, I am instantly ready to go and go right over to her thinking that this is finally when I get to cross home plate. I bang this girl on the floor, counter, table, all over and she is loud as hell. Once I finish, I get dressed again and head home on top of the world as I just got night sex and day sex from 2 different chicks. 18-year old me is sky high, top of the world.
I get home, apologize to A for bailing on our original plans, and just go about my day hanging out with friends and all the usual summer stuff. I had to work the next morning, so I didn't go out to any parties and just hung at home watching baseball. I've been texting away all night (it's probably 12-12:30 so my parents are sleeping) trying to plan my next sexcapade when I get a response from this girl (her name will be “C”) who I've been trying to hook up with forever, but she always had a boyfriend. She asks what I am doing and I clearly do not mention that I am going to bed for work the next morning. She tells me that she is just leaving a party that her cousins, who live in my neighborhood, were throwing and asks if she can stop over to hang out for a little. Immediately, I jump out of bed and try to make myself look presentable, seeing as how this may be a time where she was actually single. She comes into my house and we quietly go down to the basement to watch TV so we don't wake up my parents. She tells me that she felt the same way about me that I did about her the entire time she had a boyfriend and that they had just broken up before they came home for summer. Jackpot. We talk for a little and are laying watching tv and my hands start wandering and a few minutes later we are going at it on my basement floor (it was a finished basement, relax) and this girl was a freak. She definitely had some pent up tension she let out on me, this girl could get wetter than Niagra Falls, and we went at it like animals.
Once we were done, we went back upstairs and she left to go home and I went up to bed for work in the morning around 2 am, look at the clock and realize that just 24 hours earlier, I was railing A in her parents' basement. I woke up and went in for work feeling like I owned the place. I know I will never be able to accomplish something of that magnitude again, so I will cherish that 24 hours forever.
Presumably because the herpes sores won't allow him to not cherish it.
So it's the first week of college, and I decided it was time to do what any testosterone-filled human would do: take advantage of not having to wake my parents in the middle of the night thanks to some girls scream. It took one night. This girl had her high school boyfriend still, or so I thought. After playing games with her early in the night, being a respectful guy trying not to cross the line, this co-ed did all of the work for me and dove right in. She slowly whispered in my ear, I broke up with him for you two days ago, as she continued to drag me back to my room (mistake, I know. To quote Dom Mazzetti, “it's easier to run away from your problems in the morning then it is to wake up next to them.”)
As the scarce pieces of fabric she was wearing got torn off, I placed her phone on my desk next to mine. We continued to do our thing and the fellatio was well worth it. Being the type of bro who very much loves head, it is very hard to break my concentration. For some reason when my phone buzzed on my desk, for the 9th time, I broke my concentration and I checked it. No messages. It was 3:30am, I was getting my D sucked, so I figured it was my imagination. Curious, I then heard another buzz. It was her phone and it was face up so I could see the screen. 4 missed texts, 3 missed calls and 1 missed FaceTime request. The 9th buzz was still going on and it was this girl’s ex attempting to FaceTime. I grabbed the phone and struggled with myself as I proceeded to make the most mature decision of my life: I didn't answer. Her phone, still in hand, stopped buzzing and I heard a 10th buzz. It was mine. The crazy orb (phrase my friends use to describe non-bros, or bro backwards) friended me on Facebook.
In retelling this story I've been greeted with a myriad of responses, tears, smiles, laughs… But the best response was a friend who played me a Meek Mills song, Tony Montana in which the first line is: I popped a perk, I fucked your bitch, got you blowing up her phone while she sucking D.
Wait. Did I miss the part where he abused Percocet and then actually fucked her? Must have.
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