Daamnnn, This Is The Closest Picture Of A Comet Humans Have Ever Taken

European Space Agency

Hey! Would you look at that! That looks like … well, it looks like some ground. Some rocks, some dirt. Some stupid shit. “Why the fuck are we looking at this?” you ask me.

“I dunno,” I respond. “Did you even read the fucking headline?”

“No,” you say. “Some fucker gchatted me this and I clicked it and then read some bullshit idiot ranting about dirt.”

“Well, read the goddamn headline first. Be a better internet consumer.”

“Fuck no. Not after you just made me look at something you yourself called stupid.”

“Whatever, brah. Whatever. Be better.”

The reason this is in here (the picture, not the pointless fake conversational lede I created then decided not to cut), is because this is the closest photo of a comet ever taken.

Woot?

It’s from Rosetta’s Philae lander as it was heading toward comet 67P/Churyumov–Gerasimenko. It’s from 30 fucking feet away. Earth is 317 million miles from it, and we got this shot from 30 feet away. Talk about stalking your prey.

So look at this shit again, this time with some goddamn respect.

European Space Agency

SPACE! It’s fucking boring sometimes.

Hahaah just kidding. It’s fucking dope. I mean, we took a picture of a comet. And from it, learned that comets are DA GAWD. Quite literally, in that they are god-like. From Yahoo!:

Scientists say the Philae space probe has gathered data supporting the theory that comets can serve as cosmic laboratories in which some of the essential elements for life are assembled.

“Comets are loaded with all the raw materials like water, CO2, methane, ammonia, needed to assemble more complex organic molecules, perhaps sparked by UV-photons from the Sun or cosmic rays, or in the shock that occurs when a comet hits the surface of a planet like the young Earth,” said Mark McCaughrean, a senior scientific adviser at the European Space Agency.

It’s not yet known whether the complex molecules found in 67P were made in the early solar system and then incorporated into the comet or formed there later, he said. “Either way, it seems that comets are pretty good places to find the building blocks of molecules which later on could be used for life.”

Word what up we are from comets. I dig.