Being the low guy at work is always tricky. You are basically at the whim of your superiors and never quite know how informal you should be or how much personality you can show. Being a professional freelancer, I’ve had many bosses, and many have been incredible, fun people. However, you know what gave me a great deal of fun and satisfaction? Seeing my boss pop up on my Tinder.
A million thoughts ran through my mind. What would be the least embarrassing way to handle this so that I’m not the laughing stock of the break room? They never promote the guy they’re laughing at. I racked my brain for a couple minutes after I chuckled for a few more minutes at the situation. Unintentionally, I swiped right. I mean, why not? I don’t remember reading in my sexual harassment paperwork that swiping right on Tinder is a form of sexual harassment (unless I missed that section, because that wasn’t exactly riveting, cover-to-cover reading).
As a single man in Los Angeles, Tinder is one of the greatest inventions known to man. It’s basically if that “Hot or Not” game came with a booty call at the end. If you are on Tinder, you pretty much know what you are getting yourself into. I’ve ran into and had fun with many girls on Tinder, from an ex-flame, that chick you once may have hooked with, that girl from back home, that girl’s best friend and, to most importantly, the woman signing my paychecks. So why, why on Earth did my stunted, snickering adolescent mind tell me to swipe right?
Well, here are the top 4 reasons it is ok to swipe right on your hot boss if you find her on Tinder:
1. She’ll Swipe Left On You
Who cares. It’s not like she is going to swipe right on you. She’s your boss, she’s more professional than that. You’re still learning how to be an adult. She’s there, and she’ll be more mature. Once she swipes left, she won’t even know your response. No harm, no foul. So why not have your fun? Isn’t the point of Tinder to have fun? Sorry, sorry, I forgot. Tinder really is just about hooking up. My bad.
2. She Won’t Think Anything Of It… Probably
Whenever I run into a friend on Tinder, I usually answer truthfully. However, I was out with friends the other day and they swept right to people they knew just cause they thought it was funny. Your hot boss is probably laughing right now swiping right at you, thinking nothing of it. It’ll be a fun joke to tell around the office. If not, oh well. She probably swiped left and will never find out. As they lamely say on Tinder: YOSO (You Only Swipe Once).
You’re totally cool with your boss. You two crack jokes, make fun of that one guy in the office who always makes a mess with his lunch. Every office has that one guy everyone makes fun of, and its not you. In fact, people marvel at how you and your boss get along so well. Heck, they hit up happy hour with you. That’s practically is inviting you to swipe right on Tinder. They knew this would probably happen, and they’re gonna get a nice laugh of it. That’s why you get along so well, you both have the same type of humor, not like your friend a couple cubicles down. His boss is an asshole. I wouldn’t swipe right on his boss.
4. It’s The Truth
Sorry, but it just might be true. Don’t act like she doesn’t know it. She’s on Tinder for a reason, and it is because she wants to a) have fun, b) do it ironically since she never had trouble getting someone, or c) see who else was on there. Any which way, she either doesn’t care or she’ll laugh just because you are on Tinder. So sac up and tell the truth. She knows it. It’s not news.
Sure, this could just as well blow up in your face, but so could any other decision you ever make in your life. Grab your balls and take a risk. It’s not a particularly momentous risk, but it’s a fun one. If you don’t consistently say, “Go for it!” in life, then you aren’t doing life right.
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