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Adult Film Entitled ‘Teen Gets Knocked Up by Accidental Creampie’ Has Darkest Ending Ever (SFW)

By / 03.19.14

creampie-scene

We all watch porn. That’s just a fact of life, like the sun’s going to rise and you’re going to tell some wild untruths when you file your taxes. What isn’t a fact, however, is that all of us make it to the end of whatever porn clip is tickling our fancy on any given day. We’re jerking in a race against time, we have no seconds to waste on unnecessary scene build up or endings. We’re here for the highlights; the stuff that gets the job done. Some brave Redditor, however, made it to the end of a masterpiece entitled, Slut teen gets knocked up by accidental creampie and what was waiting for him was both dark and hilarious.

Before the ending — so you can fully understand the clip without watching it — the scenes went like this.

- Random guy in car rolls up to young girl holding notebook on side of road offering her a ride. The notebook tells us this girl is probably not a hooker, but definitely a slut. Wait. That’s probably not what that notebook symbolizes…

- After accepting his ride, because OBVIOUSLY, the pair make small talk in the car and the man confirms the girl he just scooped is a teenager. SMASH CUT.

- The pair sit on a random couch. Where? I don’t know. The man’s first words are, “you were saying something about sex-ed?” We must have missed a huge chunk of great conversation on that car ride. We’re all worse off for not having that experience.

- For no more than 9-seconds, he begs her to teach him about sex-ed. His pleas resulted in a SMASH CUT to the reason why we watch this stuff.

- Blow job city.

- Cunnilingus.

- Sex. In a bunch of positions.

- Finally, we see the man’s vinegar strokes as he cums inside the young lass.

- Screen goes black.

- Girl’s face reappears, she looks uneasy about what just transpired. As if letting a random dude, who drives a shitty car and has man bangs, cum inside her was a questionable decision.

- Screen goes black again.

- This message appears…

creampie-death

Whoa.

According to Kernal Mag this might be why the scene took a turn for the morbid:

The question remains, however: why would a porn director opt to tack on such a morbid, unnecessarily elaborate non-sequitur ending to the scene? A commenter on Porn.com, where the scene was also uploaded, has a theory: apparently Schoolgirl Internal’s schtick is to end films with the girl getting pregnant and sticking the father with child support, so killing off the mother was intended as a twist on the trope.

Welp, I’m satisfied with that possible explanation. Girl’s dead. Nothing we can do about it. Time to get on with our lives.

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TAGSAdult filmsCreampiesFunny
J. Camm
About J. Camm... J. Camm is the Managing Editor of BroBible. He is a graduate of the University of Miami thanks mostly in part to a world-class short-term memory. When not writing drivel on the Internet, J.Camm enjoys golf and the inexplicable satisfaction that comes with forgetting a person's name the exact instant he meets them.

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