Waffles McButter's Note: [inline:howie2]The first time we interviewed moonlighting adult entertainment PA Howie Marks, we peppered him with the obvious questions that an outsider would ask someone in the adult entertainment industry. We inquired about the scenes, the girls, our pen*s envy, and we even asked him if he ever got to f*ck a adult entertainment star. Sadly, at the time of that interview his answer to that question was, "almost, but no." As bros, we all know that things are constantly changing -- the seasons, STD test results, or perhaps your father's sexuality once you leave for college. What I am trying to say is that, as he hinted in our follow-up Q&A this week, Howie got another shot at glory, a chance to take down a adult entertainment star and this time, he took it. Being the kind giver he is, Howie was willing to write the tale of his sexual conquest for all the BroBible faithful to see. One note: the girls in the photos above and down below are not the girl in question. Those are just the latest prime pieces of ass that Howie has had the pleasure to work with on set. For the longest time I've been watching these girls that I've wanted to f*ck get boned by these giant-cocked men. After a while it really begins to screw with your head. My boss, director Kevin Moore, started to notice how much of a curmudgeon I was becoming and he arranged a surprise for me. All I knew was that this girl was a present from him to me and I needed to get an STD test. So I basically knew it was going to happen. I just didn't know who it was.

D-day finally arrived after waiting anxiously for an entire week. An hour before my "present" showed up I decide to have a drink or two to calm my nerves a little. After all, I didn't know whom it would be (it could have been a transsexual for all I knew) and this complete stranger was going to let me raw dog her, so clearly I was a bit nervous. Kevin knows my big thing has always been creampies (for all those at home, a creampie is when you bust your load into a girl and she squeezes out for the camera). So besides telling me to get a test, he also told me I couldn't c*m inside this girl. This being my first time in a LONG LONG time I wasn't sure I'd be able to pull out in time (more on this later). Fifteen minutes before she was to arrive I get a call from Kevin telling me her first name -- finally a clue! I scrambled on the internet searching for this unique spelling of the name and found only a few girls, none of them what I expected. Kevin had described her as cute and said that I'd love her. From the pictures I saw I wasn't nearly as thrilled as I had been. She finally arrives and I can't believe how unbelievable looking she was. As Kevin described: super cute, bubbly, and extremely nice. When she got to my apartment, I asked her for her full stage name, to which I tell her that the pictures of her don't do her any justice whatsoever. I'm clearly enamored with this girl and I offer her a drink. I too have another. We sat and talked for 30 minutes, mostly about industry things and I find out that she likes Asian guys and that's part of the reason she agreed to do this for Kevin. While we are talking I mentioned to her that I'm nervous. She tells me not to be and asks what I'm into. I tell her I love creampies and she said she'd be willing to do this for me. I AM SHOCKED. Are you kidding me?!? This young, hot girl with perfect skin wants me to c*m inside her. At this moment, I'm elated and we both get into the bedroom. She starts to undress and we start making out intensely. I've never had a girl suck on my tongue like she starts doing right away. We jump on the bed and she takes her bra off and we continue making out. She tells me to pinch her n*pples. I do and immediately start sucking on her petite little tits. I do this for a minute and move back to her face and tell her I want to go down on her. We make out some more and I slowly move my mouth down her body till I reach her crotch. I remove her panties and start going to town. I do my business down there for a solid 10 minutes -- I'm fingering her and licking her clit. She tells me she's about to c*m and takes my hand out of her and she squirts all over my sheets. Our faces meet again and she tells me she's going to go down on me. I'm crazy excited at this point but little Howie Marks is not so much so. She goes down on me and I notice a problem. I can't feel shit. OH NO, I drank too much! All I felt was the slight change in temperature and I was semi-hard at best. [inline:howi2]After doing her best at getting me hard she crawls on top of me and starts riding. Again nothing, I realize at this point that it's going to take a near miracle for me to c*m or even keep hard. We try a couple of different positions only to figure out that my dick was too limp to continue. I then realize if I can't have too much fun tonight I might as well make her night enjoyable. With this in mind I go back downtown and get her to squirt one more time. After that we made out some more and lied in the bed together just talked and fooled around a little more. While we were lying there, she told me that she'd like to come back so I can finish the job, something she didn't need to say or do. We get dressed and she made me swear to her that I'd have a huge load for her p*ssy the next time we'd meet up. Thrilled to have another shot, I walked her out to her car, and that is basically it. I know it's a long-winded story and it definitely could have been more fun if I didn't have Whiskey Dick but I did get her off twice, something that doesn't happen too much in adult entertainmento. I also realize that this required NO GAME on my part to land this girl and she was clearly a present from my boss, so I give him all the credit for setting it up. Some might say this is cheating but you take what you can get. It's a recession after all and I've been living in the dust bowl for too long. But not to toot my own horn too loudly, I just wanted to say that I did, without much effort, convince her to come back. So maybe a little pat on my back is due. And finally, who was she? Well, I'll let you know when I meet up again and this time I'll be alcohol free.