[inline:frat] It's 1 a.m. Two cool cats that have been on the table for 12 games in a row are sucking the cool out of the room but unfortunately think they're the life of the party. That blonde biddy from earlier in the night is leaving with her two bodyguards and sorostitute sisters back to the house. Fuck it. Time to leave the party. How else do you know when it's time to dip set? 10. Sick You threw up and feel like shit. Big deal. Unless you're at a dry-heaving stage and have a new version of horse or parrot flu, puke and rally; let's go brother. 9. Food Run You're hungry. And a lameass. But you're still hungry and pizza for $1.50 a slice sounds good right about now. Peace. 8. Group Dancing Hey! Soulja Boy is still cool right? How's that Mike's Hard Lemonade? Let's all get a in a big line and Crank That like it's our job. The epidemic spreads and everyone's doing it. Time to go.

[inline:super]7. Cops This mostly applies to unders. Sub-21 years of age? Like paying fines and going to court? If the party gets busted by the cops, it's time to go. 6. Randoms It's fun for a while when it's mostly your friends and some friends of friends. Then the party gets big, and then it gets bigger, and then there are more rando's at the place then one cares for. More competition means night's over. 5. Drama Is this high school? I have a big test in Earth Science tomorrow and an SAT prep course in the evening and I bring drama with me wherever I go. No fights, no b*tching, no crying. [inline:keg2]4. Another Party Most of the girls have boyfriends. The ones that don't, well, that makes sense. It's late and you get a call from your buddy down the block or across town. Let's roll, son. 3. Bad Ratio Ratio refers to guy: girl currently in attendance at the part-ay. Two guys for one girl: not good. One guy for one girl: Good. Two girls for one guy: Get me another beer. 2. Kegs Tapped No more beer = no more liquid courage = no more hook-ups. Beer's gone, along with the fun. Party's over. 1. Booty Call You get a call. She's drunk as shit, and just got back from downtown. She says come over. Be there in 10.