Tonight, Phil Jackson and Michael Jordan will help induct Scottie Pippen into the Naismith Memorial Basketball Hall of Fame. Although the last few years of retirement been unforgiving on Pippen, the former Dream Team member and six-time NBA champion has certainly paid his dues on the hardwood as basketball's "ultimate wingman" (though we'll forget about the 1994 Playoffs, if just for today). Sports writers and bloggers will be pouring on the sap to say something important about Pippen's perimeter playing style and defensive accomplishments, but we'd like to pay homage to #33's well-deserved hoops immortality with something else: Pippen's unintentionally funny pitch for Chicago's Mr. Submarine sandwich shop in 1991. The pick-up line is a pearl. Check it out below.