It’s National Condom Week! Everybody gets nuts and grab some hats!
Condom week is a big thing on most college campuses. UC Berkeley celebrated with a campus-wide program to educate the students on safe sex. Unfortunately, some of the students were only in elementary school.
Hundreds of elementary and middle school students who recently toured UC Berkeley got an early lesson in sex education when they witnessed a guy in a giant penis costume walking around handing out condoms, as well as a variety of condom-inspired games, an undergrad at the university told The College Fix on Wednesday.
Little kids love games so they were all amped to try out a couple, which included, a vagina-anus condom toss, a vulva and anus “pin the tail” game, and a condom water-balloon game. That’s way, way more fun than that President’s Fitness Challenge crap.
The campus’ health services division hosted the National Condom Week events, which also included an “insertive condom fisting activity to show how stretchy these sexy condoms can be.”
WaitWHUT? I’m a grown man and even I think that’s a little too much “hands on” teaching. Also, how many college kids are hung like a human hand? If so, isn’t that a bigger issue than obesity?
“There were hundreds of middle school and elementary schoolchildren doing tours and activities on the lawn,” said student Claire Chiara said. She said students were told explicitly they can’t give condoms to the kids. We all know how well college kids follow directions. “We had little lines of children walking down Sproul (Plaza) next to all the demonstrations, the guy in the penis suit, everything.”
In related news, ALL of those kids are applying to UC Berkeley in about ten years.