Girls
by David Covucci on March 12, 2014

JENNETTE McCURDY at Nickelodeon Kids' Choice Awards

I don’t mind the below video. A slow-motion shot of Ireland Baldwin twirling her hair and looking extremely pretty in front of a Quizno’s is fine by me.

But I want to know why? Is this guerrilla-stealth advertising for Quizno’s? A new form of sponsored content on Instagram? Is Quizno’s back? Or is it just that she’s 18 and has nothing better to do than hang in the parking lots of strip malls?

That’s what I did when I was 18. Don’t rich people’s kids have private pool houses they can drink at? I thought the whole point of being a a wealthy child was that you didn’t have to drive around in cars to smoke pot. You did it on your own property while the servants turned a blind eye.

Weirder yet, is this second video of Ireland dancing (always with the dancing) to ‘Spice Up Your Life’ by the Spice Girls. This song came out in 1997. Ireland Baldwin was born in 1995. She would have been two. Listen to jams your own age, girl.

[H/T Drunken Stepfather]

David Covucci

About David Covucci...

David Covucci is writerer-bloggerer for BroBible dot com. He loves Twitter and whiskey. He can be reached at david.covucci@brobible.com.