Girls
by Andy Moore on May 24, 2013

It was just two months ago that entitled high-schooler Jake Davidson attempted to shame Kate Upton into going to prom with him. He filmed a “clever” proposal video that went viral—thanks in part, we're sorry, to BroBible—and then he went on the Today Show and forced an awkward, clearly-not-having-it Upton to at least coyly say she “maybe could” attend. Because what else is she going to do? Give a flat-out “no”? Even though she owes him nothing, she'd get killed on the Internet if she did so, so she had to lie and set herself up to be called a “bitch” when she inevitably turned him down.

This happened a week later when Upton—who's currently trying to profit off a very brief period as the world's most in-demand modelhad to beg off because of other May obligations. And then everyone felt sorry for the HIGH SCHOOLER, even though he forced this stupid issue.

So then what happens? TV shows like Inside Edition see an opportunity to convince another supermodel to go with this guy. So Davidson films a douche-tastic second proposal video to Nina Agdal…

… Which subtly makes Kate out to be a villain, while driving Agdal to accept a stupid invitation. Now, Agdal has to spend a night catering to a collection of mouth-breathers, doesn't even get to collect an appearance fee, and Davidson makes out like a 17-year-old Make-a-Wish recipient while doing nothing to deserve the attention. He later doesn't even having the courtesy to call the occasion the “highlight of his life” during an SI interview. “It was a pretty incredible night and I enjoyed it a lot, but I don’t think it was the high point of my life,” he said. “It is certainly up there though!”

Meanwhile, Agdal has to act like she wanted to be put in such an awkward, fucked-up spot. I hate all of this. A person who's famous doesn't have to make everyone happy.

Celebrity date trolling has jumped the shark. It was okay, I guess, when those Marines did it—but a privileged high-schooler acting for his own benefit only? Get the fuck out of here. These women owe you nothing. Anyone who does what Davidson did is a fame whore on a Kardashian level.

Andy Moore

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