Girls
by Mr. T on August 4, 2013

Lauren Silverman

Everyone knows Simon Cowell for his v-necks and opinionated views on reality music shows. Now he’s also known for banging his good friend’s wife. Silverman is now separated from her former husband, but the divorce papers are still being worked out and it’s being debated whether or not she and Cowell started banging before the separation. Cowell seems like the type of guy who gets whatever he wants, so it should be no surprise he stole Silverman away from her previous husband. At least he’s got good taste. (And I’m not saying that cause she showed off her nipples the other day.)

 

Mackenzie Rosman

Some of the older readers of the website remember the show “7th Heaven.” It’s not because they actually watched the show (because it was some typical CW trash), but because it’s where Jessica Biel was unleashed onto the world. Now several years later Rosman, the youngest of the cast members, suddenly shows up in the pages of Maxim and we’re all like “what the fuck?!?” She still can’t hold a candle to Biel, but it’s definitely an awakening along the lines when Lacey Chabert emerged from Jennifer Love Hewitt’s big-boobed shadow on Party of Five.

 

Anastasia Ashley

You’re going to get our attention if you’re a hot broad who can surf in a thong, let alone surf well. (At least I think Ashley was surfing well. I was too busy staring at her ass.) I especially have a soft side for the female surfing community as I spend my second week out here on the west coast. That led to our crack research staff to track down a whole host of sweet Ashley GIFs on the internet. Since we’re in the Ashley business this week, how could she not make the Hottie Index?

Helen Flanagan

Flanagan pops into this week’s Index as its first blond and for good reason. Given that she hasn’t struck TV or movie gold since leaving long-running English soap opera Coronation Street, she realizes she has to use more than her acting skills to get attention. She graced the pages of always entertaining FHM magazine this week with that smoking hot body of hers. She then piggybacked that magazine spread by showing up to the clubs in London with a see-through dress. Heather, at least flash us a smile while you’re baring your ass to the public. You know full well what you’re doing.

Paula Patton

No one will ever tell Denzel Washington or Mark Wahlberg that they aren’t cool guys, so putting the two of em in a shoot-em-up movie called “2 Guns” (debuting this weekend) seems like a good idea. The idea got better when Patton appeared as a DEA Agent and “suggested” to take off her top in a sex scene with Denzel to make it more authentic. The girl obviously knows how to make a name for herself and strike while the iron is hot.

Mr. T

About Mr. T...

Mr. T came out of the womb with a TV remote in one hand and a piece of paper with a bookie’s number in the other. Anointed a child prodigy after winning a March Madness pool at the age of nine, Mr. T serves as BroBible’s fantasy sports expert and resident handicapper. He's never seen a road trip he didn't like and spends way too much time researching female celebrities.

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