How did they not have this when I was a child? I mean, this is amazing. It's a tortoise-shell backpack that makes you look exactly like Michelangelo (after he stole Raphael's sai but whatever that's just quibbling at this point because this is so cool). If only wearing backpacks as an adult hadn't gone out of style. It would cruise around with this and a pair of those shoes with the wheels on the heel and just be freaking awesome. Maybe sell nickel bags of schwag while I'm at it. But alas. I am too old to do those shenanigans. But you are not. Buy it now at Big Bad Toy Store. You will be a GOD on campus.
I feel like the awesomeness of this will be wasted on today's kids.