Tanks 4 Bros, $32
Our favorite Kickstarter project this week, Tanks 4 Bros was conceived by a few recent college grads after they couldn't find any tanks suitable for appropriate #raging at EDM shows. So, they designed and printed these bad boys—featuring logos inspired by house music, beats dropping, and the party lifestyle—in colors bright enough to be seen amid the strobe lights of a club. They're currently a few grand short of their Kickstarter goal, so go throw 'em some bones.
I'm grouping these two highly anticipated games together because, 1. They're both on their fourth edition (so it feels right) and 2. Their gameplay demos were leaked this week, and both look to be equally amazing. Here's a swashbuckling couple of minutes from AC4:
And an INTENSE 17 minutes of Battlefield 4:
(Almost too intense, huh? I hope 13-year-olds aren't treated for PTSD after playing.)
Still have your NES, SNES, Genesis, Famicom or Gameboy cartridges? Your device to play them on a bit less than stellar? It should be. It's from the Reagan Administration. This puppy will let you reclaim your old Super Mario Bros. 3 glory—without having to deal with all the crap that comes with old equipment. (Available in July.)
I'm not sold on the look of this thing, but if you're the type who travels a lot and can't be without your guitar, well, here you go. It promises to be almost indestructible—if you ever need to play “Crash Into Me” while it's hailing, you'll still be able to get laid—although I'm sure any punk rockers out there could still find a way to smash it after an acoustic set. Handmade in Vermont.
The Champions Ring, $65
Yes, more basketball tonight! Get PUMPED. If you're liking your chances this year (Cardinals fans), this might be worth a look. A minimalist print that illustrates the 2013 NCAA Tournament, the radial bracket is available for preorder now, and will ship as soon as every gray space gets filled. (That would be in around 10 days.)
Nike Air Max Light, $150
The colors on this exclusive edition are inspired by Easter. You'll be okay if you want to wear them after Sunday, too. (Not cool, however, if you wear them to a Sunday service.)
Just call it “Bang with Friends' Friends.” LikeBright introduces you to your friends' female acquaintances and, if there's a mutual attraction, will set you two up together while providing a great ice-breaker. The relatively new app is getting good reviews from relationship experts but, of course, you're not going to be sold until a friend says, “DUDE, I totally got laid with that!”
If bacon wasn't so damn delicious, I'd be more than tired of hearing about it by now. The Internet has become absolutely consumed with the meat over the past two years. If you were to build a digital Mt. Rushmore, it's occupying the Abraham Lincoln zone, flanking memes, Kate Upton, and, of course, cats. (I blame the Epic Meal Time guys.)
The creators of Baconkit are the latest to get in on the bacon phenomenon. They've put together a set of everything you need—minus the pork belly—to cure and season your own twist on the delicious meat. You'll be able to do it at a decent price, too.
Beer Pong Master, $TBA
Oh man. Here it is, bros: The ultimate in arcade game technology. Foodbeast has some pretty fascinating deets about this machine spotted in Vegas—here's a quick primer:
The game worked super well, and was surprisingly a great deal of fun to play. It’s all very fluid — swipe a credit card or insert a coin, pick 1 – 4 players, and be on your way. Normal beer pong mechanics are in play here, but you have a set amount of time (our machine was registered at 60-second games) to sink as many balls in the still-lit cups as possible. All 10 cups begin completely lit at the start of the timer, and once your first ball connects to the rim of any cup, the clock begins winding down until you’ve sunk a ball in every cup and dimmed all the lights, or 60 seconds has passed, whichever comes first.
One downside: The cups are empty (meaning you don't get that satisfying sploosh after a made shot). You'll have to use your own beer to drink whenever your opponent cans a shot. Still, here's to hoping these are located in every Dave and Busters in the country within the year.
Jaguar XKR-S GT, $174,000
Gonna let the more qualified folks at Jalopnik break down the look of this ridiculous and unexpected Jaguar:
It's a masterpiece in black and white. 550 horsepower. Aero bits on aero bits on aero bits. Carbon brakes.
There are aero bits that you'd never expect on a Jag, the rear wing is big enough to eat off of, it looks like a storm trooper/carp fish, it has carbon brakes, it makes real downforce, and it has a V8 that sounds unreal.
Jaguar made a 550 horsepower coupe for only North America with a huge wing and a crazy paint job. Kudos. I love it.
Yep. Us too.