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Here’s the dumb Emmy nominations

By 07.19.12
Emmy Awards


It’s the only people on Earth who think Two And A Half Men is funny! Actually, I might have to change that description, because the worst show on TV only got one nomination, for Jon “Unfunny” Cryer. The new “this doesn’t belong” Chuck Lorre show is Big Bang Theory, which looks really out of place next to shows like Curb Your Enthusiasm and Girls. The big winners, nomination-wise, are Mad Men and American Horror Story, with a staggering 17 each.

I liked American Horror Story but I wouldn’t go so far as to call it “good.” More like “incredibly addictive and trashy.” But maybe that’s just what we like these days. Here’s the complete list of nominees, along with my picks of what will win and what should win.


The Big Bang Theory
Curb Your Enthusiasm
Girls – Should win
Modern Family
30 Rock – Will win


Jim Parsons as Sheldon Cooper in The Big Bang Theory
Larry David as Himself in Curb Your Enthusiasm
Don Cheadle as Marty Kaan in House of Lies
Louis C.K. as Louie in Louie – Should win
Alec Baldwin as Jack Donaghy in 30 Rock – Will win
Jon Cryer as Alan Harper in Two and a Half Men


Lena Dunham as Hannah Horvath in Girls – Should win
Melissa McCarthy as Molly Flynn in Mike & Molly
Zooey Deschanel as Jess Day in New Girl – Will win
Edie Falco as Jackie Peyton in Nurse Jackie
Amy Poehler as Leslie Knope in Parks and Recreation
Tina Fey as Liz Lemon in 30 Rock
Julia Louis-Dreyfus as Selina Meyer in Veep


Ed O’Neill as Jay Pritchett in Modern Family
Jesse Tyler Ferguson as Mitchell Pritchett in Modern Family
Ty Burrell as Phil Dunphy in Modern Family
Eric Stonestreet as Cameron Tucker in Modern Family
Max Greenfield as Schmidt in New Girl – Should win. Have no idea who will. Someone from Modern Family, probably.
Bill Hader as various characters in Saturday Night Live


Mayim Bialik as Amy Farrah Fowler in The Big Bang Theory
Kathryn Joosten as Karen McCluskey in Desperate Housewives
Julie Bowen as Claire Dunphy in Modern Family
Sofia Vergara as Gloria Delgado-Pritchett in Modern Family
Merritt Wever as Zoey Barkow in Nurse Jackie
Kristen Wiig as various characters in Saturday Night Live – Will win, should win.


Boardwalk Empire – Will win
Breaking Bad – Should win
Downton Abbey
Game of Thrones
Mad Men


Glenn Close as Patty Hewes in Damages
Michelle Dockery as Lady Mary Crawley in Downton Abbey
Julianna Margulies as Alicia Florrick in The Good Wife
Kathy Bates as Harriet Korn in Harry’s Law
Claire Danes as Carrie Mathison in Homeland
Elisabeth Moss as Peggy Olson in Mad Men – Will win, should win


Steve Buscemi as Nucky Thompson in Boardwalk Empire – Will win
Bryan Cranston as Walter White in Breaking Bad
Michael C. Hall as Dexter Morgan in Dexter
Hugh Bonneville as Robert, Earl of Grantham in Downton Abbey
Damian Lewis as Nicholas Brody in Homeland – Should win
Jon Hamm as Don Draper in Mad Men


Anna Gunn as Skyler White in Breaking Bad
Maggie Smith as Violet, Dowager Countess of Grantham in Downton Abbey – Will win, should win, no arguments.
Joanne Froggatt as Anna in Downton Abbey
Archie Panjabi as Kalinda Sharma in The Good Wife
Christine Baranski as Diane Lockhart in The Good Wife
Christina Hendricks as Joan Holloway Harris in Mad Men


Aaron Paul as Jesse Pinkman in Breaking Bad
Giancarlo Esposito as Gustavo ‘Gus’ Fring in Breaking Bad – Will win, should win, but this is the most packed category as everyone is great.
Brendan Coyle as John Bates in Downton Abbey
Jim Carter as Mr. Carson in Downton Abbey
Peter Dinklage as Tyrion Lannister in Game of Thrones
Jared Harris as Lane Pryce in Mad Men


Tim Van Patten, Boardwalk Empire
Vince Gilligan, Breaking Bad – Will win, should win
Brian Percival, Downton Abbey
Michael Cuesta, Homeland
Phil Abraham, Mad Men


American Horror Story – Will win
Game Change
Hatfields & McCoys
Hemingway & Gellhorn
Luther – Should win. Seriously, if you haven’t watched this, it’s on Netflix Instant, get on it.


Connie Britton as Vivien Harmon, American Horror Story
Julianne Moore as Sarah Palin, Game Change – Will win
Nicole Kidman as Martha Gellhorn, Hemingway & Gellhorn
Ashley Judd as Rebecca Winstone, Missing – Should… haha, no, I can’t even bring myself to make this joke. This wasn’t even a “miniseries,” it just got cancelled.
Emma Thompson as She, The Song of Lunch


Woody Harrelson as Steve Schmidt, Game Change – Will win
Kevin Costner as ‘Devil’ Anse Hatfield, Hatfields & McCoys
Bill Paxton as Randall McCoy, Hatfields & McCoys
Clive Owen as Ernest Hemingway, Hemingway & Gellhorn
Idris Elba as John Luther, Luther
Benedict Cumberbatch as Sherlock Holmes, Sherlock – Should win


The Colbert Report
The Daily Show With Jon Stewart – Will win
Jimmy Kimmel Live
Late Night With Jimmy Fallon
Real Time With Bill Maher – Should win
Saturday Night Live


American Dad!
Bob’s Burgers – Should win
The Penguins Of Madagascar
The Simpsons – Will win

About K. Thor Jensen... K. Thor Jensen is an award-winning writer and graphic novelist who lives on a tiny island in the middle of nowhere. His website is Shortandhappy.com. He fought six Draculas and won.
TAGS30 RockAmerican Horror StoryawardsBoardwalk EmpireBreaking BadCurb Your EnthusiasmDownton AbbeyEmmy AwardsEmmysGame of ThronesGirlsHomelandLouieLutherMad MenModern FamilySherlockThe Big Bang TheoryTVTwo and a Half MenVeep

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