Every week celebrities go on Twitter and speak their minds. Sometimes they’re funny, sometimes they’re thought-provoking, and sometimes we don’t know what they’re talking about. This list is all of that and more. Strap in. It could get bumpy.
I don't know much about football, but I know that Ray Rice is a piece of garbage who shouldn't be allowed to play it professionally anymore.
— Seth Rogen (@Sethrogen) September 8, 2014
Hard to argue.
https://twitter.com/chrissyteigen/status/508939969491374080
She has a point.
I love you fuckers, go to work today & tell every coworker that you love them, hell if you want a raise kiss your boss while saying it…
— Chad Johnson (@ochocinco) September 8, 2014
I don’t think he would appreciate it.
Hey Prince William, I already have 2 kids because I'm better than you.
— rob delaney (@robdelaney) September 8, 2014
Scoreboard.
https://twitter.com/michaelianblack/status/508947749786877952
This is true.
Remember when #Ravens fans gave #RayRice a standing O…. Twice? Good times
— Doug Gottlieb (@GottliebShow) September 8, 2014
Whoops.
The Ray Rice video I just saw sickens me. Disgusting. No place for it. Anywhere.
— Rich Eisen (@richeisen) September 8, 2014
Can’t disagree.
Ravens have to waive Rice today or they are cowards. New video is appalling. I'd like to see someone in the NFL do the right thing for once.
— Bill Simmons (@BillSimmons) September 8, 2014
They have been struggling a bit of late.
NFL never saw that video before today. I also have a bridge i'd like to sell you.
— Tom Crabtree (@itsCrab) September 8, 2014
Is it a pretty bridge?
BREAKING: Scientist discover those ugly running shoes with toes that look like human feet are the cause of Ebola.
— Jim Gaffigan (@JimGaffigan) September 8, 2014
Makes sense.
I had a dream my Wrestlemania gear was a sundress and I frog splashed a tortilla chip until it cracked for the win. So…spoiler alert.
— AJ Mendez (@TheAJMendez) September 8, 2014
No reason to subscribe the WWE Network now.
Another day spent whackin off to Ice Bucket Challenge Videos.
— Jeff Ross (@realjeffreyross) September 8, 2014
Seems like a solid use of time though.
This Ray Rice guy is a real asshole.
— Alyssa Milano (@Alyssa_Milano) September 8, 2014
Profound assessment.
I cannot clear my history enough. I wish I could bleach it.
— Sarah Silverman (@SarahKSilverman) September 9, 2014
That idea could be worth millions.
I've looked like shit in every movie I've done and and I've gotten zero critical acclaim for it.
— Seth Rogen (@Sethrogen) September 9, 2014
You have to actually start out pretty like Jennifer Aniston.
The new @taylorswift13 song is so catchy that I know all the words and I still haven't heard it yet.
— Ben Schwartz (@rejectedjokes) September 9, 2014
She does have that sort of power over us.
God bless those nature people who gently pick up bugs in their home and put them back outside and shit.
— Joanna (@iamjojo) September 9, 2014
So eloquently said until right there at the end.
Just blocked a troll with one follower. I mean, how ****ing weird do you have to be to have ONE follower?
— Piers Morgan (@piersmorgan) September 9, 2014
It’s not the size of the followers…
This would be a very exciting day if there were anyone on earth I was interested in communicating with. #AppleEvent
— (((Jew))) (@JoshMalina) September 9, 2014
You should still get one because it’s cool.
The Apple employees are ruining fashion week!!!!
— Jenny Johnson (@JennyJohnsonHi5) September 9, 2014
Fashion Week really should have rescheduled.
https://twitter.com/JenKirkman/status/509450170367373313
That is sad.
Lean into the discomfort.
— Aubrey O'Day (@AubreyODay) September 10, 2014
Okay. Wait, what?
Always used to say"don't believe everything you read"
Now I say "Don't believe ANYTHING you read"
Goodnight tweeties.— Lisa Vanderpump (@LisaVanderpump) September 10, 2014
I don’t believe her.
.@Apple If my dick looks even smaller in pics taken with a larger phone, I will sue you.
— rob delaney (@robdelaney) September 10, 2014
And rightfully so.
The new U2 album should be called "Spam"
— Andy Richter (@AndyRichter) September 10, 2014
Nailed it.
The Dalai Lama says he should not have a successor and that the position has served its purpose. Sorry, Ray Liotta.
— Conan O'Brien (@ConanOBrien) September 10, 2014
Ray’s gonna be so pissed.
Does anyone know when the next rapture is? The last few have been a bit disappointing, if I'm being honest 🙁
— Ricky Gervais (@rickygervais) September 10, 2014
They have been rather lame.
https://twitter.com/JenKirkman/status/509777489023868928
Their honeymoon will take place in the rest room of their next flight.
God's got a blessing with my name on it!!!
— Russell Wilson (@DangeRussWilson) September 10, 2014
Ever notice how rich and successful people get more “blessings” than the rest of us?
“Um Roger, bring your playbook” #NFL
— Doug Gottlieb (@GottliebShow) September 10, 2014
The Turk is calling.
https://twitter.com/ChrisWarcraft/status/509808929065672704
Goodell is out of excuses.
Two sharknados attacked usa during the past 2 years & Obama & Congress did nothing to stop it.
— Judah Friedlander (@JudahWorldChamp) September 11, 2014
Thanks, Obama.
https://twitter.com/therealfrancia/status/509953735288561664
I’d REALLY like to eat dinner with her sometime.
Just checking – does everyone else take dumps in the same room as the thing they clean their mouth with?
— Nate Fernald (@natefernald) September 11, 2014
Well, when you put it that way…
Ray Rice's punishment should fit his crime. I say we lock him in an elevator with Solange Knowles and give him a taste of his own medicine.
— bettemidler (@BetteMidler) September 11, 2014
As far as Ray Rice jokes go, not bad.
https://twitter.com/zachbraff/status/510158889908592640
He must have been using a PC.
https://twitter.com/WhitneyCummings/status/510307920542576640
How about a tweet?
If you're still in the club when it's closing, you're doing it wrong.
— Dane Cook (@DaneCook) September 12, 2014
Words to live by.
https://twitter.com/chrissyteigen/status/510415862335938560
We wouldn’t dare.
FUCK THE APPLE WATCH
— The Iron Sheik (@the_ironsheik) September 9, 2014
Have a great weekend, everybody!