Sources told TMZ that Bieber spends every day high on life and a nice mixture of Xanax, weed, booze and continuous sips of sizzurp. For those on the straight and narrow, sizzurp is a mixture of codeine, promethazine, Sprite and a Jolly Rancher and those last two companies MUST LOVE that kind of free publicity.
Sources insist Bieber is NOT DOING COCAINE because the kid has a reputation to uphold.
Maybe when the Biebs announced his retirement last night, he was actually referring to his liver. It probably stopped working months ago.
I want more like this!
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