by Brandon Cohen on July 2, 2014

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If this doesn’t get you fired up for some barbecue, fireworks, beer and xenophobia then I don’t know what will.

Comedian Eli Braden¬†consistently cracks me up with his song parodies on the Howard Stern Show, but he might’ve outdone himself with this ditty in honor of this great country of ours called “I Eat What I Fuck.” It has everything you want in great patriotic song – exploding bald eagles, sleeveless American flag tees, threatening to shoot “pussy liberals,” and most importantly, fornicating with the bloody carcass of the animal you just hunted.

Bravo Eli, you’re a true patriot.

Check it out. I’ve watched it ten times and it still cracks me up.

Brandon Cohen

About Brandon Cohen...

Brandon Cohen was raised by Jew gypsies on the sleepy island of Manhattan, and went on to defy the odds by graduating from a four-year accredited university in Nashville, TN. He's a writer and aspiring street fight videographer. Back in 2008, Brandon talked to Amanda Bynes at a club in LA for over fifteen minutes.