I have no idea why I watched this, but I hate myself for it. I thought maybe there would be a glimpse of Topanga or Shawn Hunter cracking some sort of joke about skipping out on Mr. Feeny’s class back in the day to get baked in the Home-Ec closet. But nothing. Absolutely nothing. Just Corey Matthews acting like some sort of lame dad while his girls try to sneak out of the house. Yawn. Cookie cutter Disney garbage.
This is going to suck balls. But I’m not sure what we were expecting? We — a society that gets way too excited on Twitter and Facebook and the stupidest shit imaginable — are to blame for it. The only reason this garbage exists is because hive-minded sheep sharing and RTing and “OMG OMG OMG OMGing” got way too excited for this. A sucker is born on social media hype every second. Disney saw an opportunity from a lame Twitter trending topic and struck. Good for them.
It’s still bullshit.
Hey world: Can we please keep all the things from my awesome ’90s childhood in the past and STOP TRYING TO BRING THEM BACK?! Companies like Disney are ruining an entire generation’s childhood almost 15 years after we’ve left it. These cultural franchises were perfect as we chose to remember them, as virgin, untainted, and precious childhood memories. The past is where Boy Meets World and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and a Keenan and Kel reunion and all the other nostalgic crap belongs.
Corey Matthews trying to teach life lessons to his daughters is just not that magical to world-weary, cynical adult eyes. Create something new, Disney, so we — the social media suckers of the world — can re-learn how to restrain our excitement. I promise whatever you dream up in mouse-ears thinktank will be more compelling than a Mr. Feeny-less Boy Meets World-20-years-later fever dream.
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