You don’t have to be able to handle lactose to know how good the cheese in 80s movies is — or that line I just wrote, because it’s pure cheese and I’ll issue a formal apology later. That’s what the 80s were. Fucking cheese EVERYWHERE. That’s what made movies back then so great. Whether it’s Cole Trickle entering a scene the moment his character is mentioned, clad in leather and on a motorcycle (douche-chills, anyone?), or Sly Stallone wearing leather driving gloves, rocking sunglasses indoors, using a match as a toothpick and telling a criminal “you’re a disease and i’m the cure” right before blowing him the fuck away all in the same scene (4-hour erection, anyone?)…80s movies are not shit, they’re THE SHIT. So stop nitpicking these masterpieces of my childhood.
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