So We Beat On, Boats Against the Current, Watching Another F*cking ‘Great Gatsby’ Trailer

I've rhapsodized at-length here on BroBible about Baz Luhrmann's Great Gatsby movie, the one that got pushed back to be a blockbuster summer release and features Jay-Z on the soundtrack (along with Jack White, Lana Del Rey, the xx and Florence and the Machine). Because I majored in English in college (gainfully employed, too, so f*ck you) and a sucker for pulsing green lights on the end of docks, I'll probably shell out $12 to go see it on opening weekend. 

But… Personally, I'm starting to think this adaptations of the F. Scott Fitzgerald's literary classic (one of my favorite books of all time) is going to suck balls. Though I want Gatsby to make big, grandiose, metaphorical statements about the ethical decay and moral bankruptcy of the American Dream as F. Scott intended, I'm pretty sure its just going to come across as a sloppy, sappy soap opera during the Jazz Age. I'm already setting myself up for disappointment, crying into a closet filled with expensive shirts of many different colors. Deep, Bro. 

Also, what gives with the drifting/street racing scene over the Queensboro Bridge? Vince Mancini nails it: “I especially enjoyed the street racing, but I imagine they’re saving most of it for the sequel, Gatsby 2: Tokyo Drift.

Groan.

Brandon Wenerd is BroBible's publisher, writing on this site since 2009. He writes about sports, music, men's fashion, outdoor gear, traveling, skiing, and epic adventures. Based in Los Angeles, he also enjoys interviewing athletes and entertainers. Proud Penn State alum, former New Yorker. Email: brandon@brobible.com