I just tuned into TMZ for the Kardashian drama and this treasure caught my eye. It's Arnold's bastard boy dressed as Conan the Barbarian for Halloween. You can tell me he was someone else, He-Man, Thor, a unidentified neanderthal, or the like, but I wouldn't believe you. That lad is screaming for his father's love and attention. He wants the former governor of Cally-Forn-YA to be his papa. To throw the ball with him. To show him proper form in the weight room. And most importantly, to teach him how to achieve that feeling of perpetual c*mming. Do the right thing, Oak. Call the boy.