4/20 is tomorrow which of course means every pothead in the world is going to tell you about it. We all remember the first time we toked up. Maybe it was in high school, or in college, or maybe it happened at a young age when your older brother decided that you needed to ‘expand your mind, maaaaaaan.’ No matter when your first time was, it probably wasn’t when you were still watching Nickelodeon cartoons on a Saturday morning. With that being said, you definitely didn’t pick up on the fact that many of those very characters you watched as a child were undeniably under the influence of pot. Thankfully, for you, I’ve done some analysis and created a list of 8 Nickelodeon characters that were definitely potheads.
Tito from Rocket Power
This one is totally obvious, a fat Hawaiian dude who surfs, cooks hamburgers and always tries to teach children lessons using ancient Hawaiian proverbs. Clearly a HUGE stoner. There were probably several scenes in the series where Tito was smoking a joint right before the kids walked up and he had to toss it into the bushes so they didn’t know what he was up to.
Filbert from Rocko’s Modern Life (photo above)
Aside from being Jewish, nothing except smoking the ganja would give this turtle such bad OCD, anxiety and paranoia. Troubled in one-way or another, Filbert probably used pot as a means to fit in and didn’t realize that it was making him even more of a hypochondriac. Some people react differently on pot and clearly Filbert is one of those dudes who are just paranoid.
Stu Pickles from The Rugrats
Stu Pickles was a man who wasn’t ready for kids, then without warning, Tommy popped out. With all the expenses that come with a newborn piled on top of the pressure from his wife to invent something worth a shit, the stress must’ve been overwhelming. He probably spent most of his days in the basement smoking joint after joint coming up with ideas for inventions. Then, when he actually thought of something decent, he was definitely too high to build it properly and that is where the plot of almost every episode came from.
Stimpy from Ren and Stimpy
Stimpy was so high all the time; he couldn’t even keep his tongue inside of his mouth. He was way too laidback and completely oblivious to the fact that his own actions were bothering his roommate Ren. I’ve lived with potheads and they DON’T CARE ABOUT YOU. That paired with the fact that he was always hungry leads me to believe that Catnip wasn’t the only thing that this fat cat was getting into.
Dog from Catdog
Dog was completely aloof to the entire world. He had a short attention span, he couldn’t help but talk really slow and loud, plus he liked to eat garbage (and not garbage like he had a bad diet, garbage as in other people’s trash). Much like Stimpy, dog was way too high to even care about how angry he made Cat every single episode. The majority of the time, I don’t even think he realized or cared that he had a cat coming out of where his ass should be. This must have taken both years of therapy and continued marijuana use to cope with.
Gerald from Hey Arnold!
One look at Gerals and you can tell by his hair that he takes sacks to the face. A normal non-stoner person wouldn’t dare style their hair like that. (You probably thought I was going to say something racist you presumptuous bastard).
Judy (Doug’s Sister) from Doug
Judy, the forgotten sister of Doug was never really a main character in the series (probably because she was off getting high) but a prime example of a different kind of stoner. Unlike the other less intelligent pothead characters we’ve discussed, Judy was an eclectic, artsy type who was too cool for school. I would venture out to say that she was one of the original hipsters and when she was off camera she was probably blowing weed smoke into Porkchop’s ear.
His house is a pineapple, his best friend is partially retarded, he works at a fast food restaurant and he’s always daydreaming. Spongebob is literally the most stereotypical pothead that a kid’s show could have conjured up.
Aristotle is a Los Angeles based comedian who believes that weed is a gateway drug to burritos. You can follow him on Twitter @STOTLE.