Entertainment
by Thomas on November 27, 2013

Maybe that was a bit sarcastic, or just maybe it is the single greatest day of the year because those of us that aren’t running around like sheep get to sit and watch everyone else fight and claw over saving ten dollars.

So it is the best time of the year. People spend Thanksgiving with their families and friends and speak about being thankful for things but then on Friday that all changes. All the kindness and pleasantry goes out the window and the shopping trolls come out to play.

Here is a list of the 25 reasons to hate Black Friday.

22. Doorbusters Suck

Yes they do. If you grab one of the many Black Friday ads and take a look at the doorbuster sales, what do you see? I see five to six items, none of which I need, that are marked down to ridiculous prices, but only for an hour. It just isn’t worth the time it will take to wake up and head down to the store. And don’t think you can wake up early anymore. Nope. You have to start on Thanksgiving Day.

21. Babysitting

If you have a child or two, then you already know what is coming. When the wife wants to go shopping on Black Friday and the baby has to stay home, who wins that fight? Not you, that’s who. So you end up spending the day babysitting instead of sleeping or watching football.

20. Doesn’t Feel Like Christmas

Isn’t Christmas supposed to be a time for peace and joy? If you ever walked into a Wal-Mart the day after Black Friday, you wouldn’t know it. It looks like a bomb went off. Products are all over the place and if you wanted help, good luck because no one is happy anymore. Everyone just wants to go home.

19. Ruins Your Holiday Vacation

Being off of work means sleeping in and not having to do anything, right? Well, not during Black Friday. That only means you have to start Thanksgiving dinner at 11am so the family can head to the store for the sales that evening. Instead of relaxing, you end up rushing through your holiday vacation and actually look forward to being able to work again.

18. Too Early

It is too early for shopping. If you decide to skip the Thanksgiving Day stuff, you still have to head over to the lines at the stores that started forming hours before midnight. You can’t expect to show up at 6am anymore and get anything you want. If you want anything then you just have to stay up for two days and power through it. No thanks.

17. Unhappy Employees

Nobody wants to work the morning after Thanksgiving so who do you think wants to work the night of too? No one. The employees you will encounter on Black Friday are the losers of the contest. They are the new hires, the rookies, and the ones that owe other people favors. No one is volunteering to work that day. In fact, everyone requests vacation on that day just to be as far away from it as possible.

16. Sales are Too Specific

The sales are so specific that if you don’t want or need those products you are wasting your time. For example, if you don’t need a TV, why are you standing in line at Best Buy? Go online and get what you need for the same price.

15. Not Enough Products in Stores

If the companies that make all these fabulous products cared about us, the consumer, they would make more of it. Instead, stores have limited quantities of these products, and we mean limited, and sell out within seconds of door openings. It isn’t worth the time to get dressed let alone waste your holiday time on.

14. Forget About Your Health

Everyone is crammed and squished into tight spaces on Black Friday, touching everything. Do you think you won’t get sick? It is the time of year where people get sick, so you will get sick. You might even get the flu. You know where you won’t get the flu? From your house, in bed, in your pajama’s.

13. Can’t Shop with a Hangover

Black Friday shopping is tough already but imagine doing it with a hangover. It is horrible. Thanksgiving is the one day of the year you have to drink just to get through it so why would you prevent yourself from all that fun?

12. Cheap, Crappy Brands

Who are Element, Insignia, or Funai? It appears that some of the best Black Friday deals are full of it. The TV’s you think are such a great deal are actually the crappiest thing you can buy. Do yourself a favor and spend the extra money on a product that will last more than a year. If you can’t then you probably shouldn’t be out shopping, you should be home saving.

11. It’s Too Busy

This one should be self-explanatory. Everywhere you go is busy. The lines are long, the people are all over the place, and the traffic is horrible. The level of stress you will encounter is enough to put you in a hospital until 2015. Why? Because everyone on Black Friday needs to get somewhere else before you. Remember that.

10. Car Crashes

It is bad enough that the crowds and traffic are horrible but what about the bad drivers that are too busy trying to cut you off to get to the store five seconds before you? Those are the people that end up causing fender benders or even worse accidents. My truck is a beast but she doesn’t need to be getting smacked on the tailgate by some rushing deal shopper. No thanks.

9. It Makes You Angry

Is anyone happy when they come home after spending all Friday shopping in massive crowds? No. People come home miserable and say that they never want to do it again. Black Friday puts people in a bad mood especially when they don’t get the deals they wanted heading into the day.

8. Destroys Small Businesses

This might not matter to most of you but it does to others. The small businesses that we need to help keep this economy going are destroyed on Black Friday. The only deals you end up getting are only at major retailers, or so you think. That is the problem. Small businesses don’t have the money to advertise but they are having the sales too. Don’t forget about them.

7. Impulse Spending

You won’t get what you wanted so when you wake up early and head down to the store, you aren’t going back home with nothing now, are you? No way. You end up buying whatever you can because you have the money to spend. And sometimes, you end up spending a hell of a lot more than you originally prepared for so make sure to leave some of that cash at home.

6. Bathroom Breaks

Good luck going to the bathroom on Black Friday. The lines are so long you end up holding it in because standing in a bathroom line takes away from shopping and saving. But eventually it catches up to you and you will have no choice. So now you are in a long line and have to go to the bathroom so bad you can taste it. Fun, fun, fun.

5. Weather

It’s cold. Unless you live in South Beach, it will be cold on Black Friday. You will end up spending hours outside stores in the cold weather and believe me, it sucks. There is no way around it, cold weather isn’t fun for more than about five minutes and that is even too long.

4. Cyber Monday

All those fantastical deals you hear about are just about the same thing on Cyber Monday. Why? Because those same retailers are greedy and know how to fool consumers. So don’t be a fool and skip Black Friday and stay home for Cyber Monday where you can do all the same shopping in bed.

3. Starts on Thanksgiving Now

Thanksgiving use to be a day for giving thanks, eating turkey, and watching football. Now it is a day to hurry up and eat, DVR the games, and discusses how you are going to waste all your money shopping because Black Friday begins at six in the evening.

2. Dangerous

Some people, not everyone, wants to get that final deal and will do anything to obtain it. Even if they have to punch and kick their way into the front of the line or even shoot. Yes, people shoot people on Black Friday over sales. They also run over old people and kill them. It is an ugly thing to witness and is dangerous enough to tell me to stay home.

1. People Suck

People suck. And if you didn’t think so before Black Friday, you will walk away believing it after. When you watch a grown ass woman snatch a children’s toy from a child and a man shove a woman so he can grab the last toaster, you will agree.