I’ve seen a lot of April Fool’s Day jokes in my 22 years of life, but none of them have involved the KKK. It makes sense, really – the KKK isn’t funny. Yes they’re a bunch of grown men running around in bed sheets which you’d think would be funny, but then you add in the whole white supremacy aspect and the whole concept goes from Will Ferrell funny to dumpster-full-of-dead-puppies funny.
Yet somehow, one Virginia Tech Redditor by the username of SPAGHETTIMONSTER managed to April Fools his roommate into thinking he was selling his La-Z-Boy sofa chair to the KKK, and believe it or not the long con actually played off.
It all started out when the roommate, “George,” decided to put a La-Z-Boy chair on Craigslist. Realizing this was a good moment to fuck with him in time for April Fool’s day, SPAGHETTIMONSTER started emailing him pretending to be a supervisor of the local KKK chapter.
Greetings,
The local chapter of an organization i manage has expressed interest in this sofa chair. We many questions, but first i will just inquire as to the age of the chair and how long it has been in your possession? Also, does the chair show signs of dilapidation like noisy joints or ripped fabric?
This happens to be the exact model of chair that our Imperial Officers currently sit during meetings, so we very much like to have an extra. We are located at [REDACTED] and would need delivery. We will pay $100 for the chair, not including an generous delivery fee. Please let us know how much it money is needed to have this chair delivered to our office.-Citizen Richard
Hello Richard,
Since you were so generous to offer more than what I was asking I will give you full disclosure on the state of the chair. It’s probably around 15-20 years old. Where the arms meet the back there are small rips beneath the fold, these aren’t visible unless you look and I have noticed no spreading of the tears. Where your right leg would rest on the corner of the arm and leg rest the material is worn down but not ripped. The chair squeaks (not loudly) when rocked in aggressively and when first sat in. WD40 may help, I can apply some and see if it does. The end of the lever to recline has been chewed by a dog at some point but is not splintered. It’s been in my family since new, and in my apartment personally for a year now.
You are 83 miles away and would have to compensate for gas. At least $70 for delivery seems appropriate to me.Regards, George
George,
Thank you for responding so quickly. You’re estimate for a $70 delivery seems so kind for the long drive, and we gladly accept your generosity. Supporters like you are the driving force that keeps our organization alive in these tough times. You will be compensated in the true spirit of our community, I insist. However, before we can consider a final deal I would like to see a picture of whichever tear is the worst looking. We also need to ensure that no sodomistic or blasphemous acts have taken place on this lounger, please check will any previous owners you know. Be honest because I will know if your lying. Let’s work out a time for you to come by the HQ. Are you available to deliver during normal business hours?
Today, Tomorrow, and the Future, Citizen Richard
Some pictures are attached below. No blasphemous acts have been committed on the chair, not in my apartment, it has been in storage for the past 10 years and was owned by my friend’s family in the years before that and he attests. I can only make a one time offer to deliver the chair on Saturday around 9:30am, I hope you can make that work.
-George
Mr. George,
We are only open during normal business hours. We do not open on weekends. Unfortunately, we can only accept deliveries on Wednesday’s because of shopping center policy, however we are willing to break the rules for the lounger, if necessary. Alternatively, my son takes a load down to Christiansburg on the first of every month, and that is only 5 miles from Blacksburg. If it is not possible to come this Wednesday, we can arrange a pickup on April 1 for the same price.
Hopefully this will work with youre schedule, but if not please let me know what I can do to help. The lounger is a high priority item amongst our Imperial Council and I do not want to let them down.For the good of the race,
Citizen Richard
Richard,
In order to get the chair there’s two options. I made plans with a family friend near Beckley in order to make the drive worthwhile this weekend. If you’re willing to bend some rules I can still drop the chair off in another public place (tomorrow) and after that do what you wish with it. Because of classes I don’t want to make a long drive on a Wednesday. April 1st may work for me, what price will you pay for it in Christiansburg, and what time will it be there?
-George
George,
Thank you for being patient, and I apologize for not getting back to you this week. Our organization has just returned from a thrilling week long outing and I had no access to email. Since only one of your options is still available, I will direct my son to meet with you in Christiansburg on Wednesday, April 1, if you still have the lounger. Since you no longer need to deliver it too far, I figure 20$ instead of 70$ would be fair, plus the 100 for the lounger itself. His delivery is early in the morning, I hope that is fine. Please let us know if you still have the lounger.
For the good of the race, Citizen Richard
Richard,
I still have the lounger. I can be in Christiansburg around 10:20 at the earliest. Let me know what public parking lot to meet and what time.
-George
Nearly didn’t see this in time, You can meet my son Red at Home Depot Parking lot in Christiansburg, VA. He’ll be looking out for you at 11am. Glad we made this work out, our Imperial Officers will be so pleased! This calls for celebration, I hope you like white ligttning. Thanks MR. George
For the good of the race, Citizen Richard
As soon as George left to meet “Red” at Home Depot SPAGHETTIMONSTER got in another car with a friend and drove to another parking lot nearby to Home Depot. When they arrived they saw George waiting to sell the chair, and set their plan into action.
Before George left, I hid a printout of this reddit post (as it was this morning) in the glove box. I emailed him from the fake email and told him to open the glove box. From my staging area, I could see him open the box and begin reading. I weaved through cars, getting as close as I can, and when I saw his frown turn to a smile, I pounced! My friend and I ran up to the truck yelling “April Fools!” and jumping around.
Luckily, George loved the whole prank and was a great sport about it, despite not going home with the $70 he anticipated.
Score 1 for the long con and 0 for the KKK.
[H/T Reddit and reader email, header image via Shutterstock]