This is the front page of last Thursday's "Rebel Yell," the official UNLV student newspaper:
But.... But isn't school better than a summer job? It's this just assumed? You're at UNLV! There's a casino in the back of that picture! How can you not be enjoying yourself?
Someone take this headline writer out, please. He just got dumped. He needs the classiest Mai Tai you can find at the Flamingo's lobby bar. Stat.
[H/T: Huff Po]