Best. Night. Ever.
I want to go on assignment and spend a few weeks just chilling at night in a police station near a major college campus. The shit those cops must see... For instance, this lovely story about a 19-year-old University of Florida Bro who seems to be really conflicted as to whether or not he wants someone to lob off his fucking penis. Make up your mind, for Christ's sake.
According to The Raw Story:
Police in Gainesville were called to Campus Club Apartments at around 1 a.m. on Saturday by residents who said they witnessed Michael Joseph Silecchia running through the halls of the building, according to The Independent Florida Alligator.
Silecchia told police responding to the call that he was “straight” and he was “God.”
After stripping off his clothes, Silecchia begged officers, “Don’t cut off my penis.”
But the 19-year-old man later changed his mind, saying, “Cut off my penis.”
A police report said that the suspect punched a female officer in a head when they tried to subdue him. Silecchia was shocked with a Taser about six times, but it had little effect.
Of course it had little effect. The police should know better: you don't bring a taser to a castration party. Idiots.