There are powerful forces in the universe that my weak, feeble little mind just cannot wrap my head around: Dark matter, the nuclear physics behind supernobas, and why every Starbucks sipping, 20-something girl is obsessed with “Queen Bae” Beyoncé Knowles are three. Of course I think Beyoncé is talented and graceful as fuck, but is someone who is definitely batshit crazy really worth the idolized fawning? We hit peak Bae after her performance at the Super Bowl; It seems like Bae fever has hit critical mass until she pops out her next baby.
But I digress. Today is Beyoncé’s birthday, which has sent all the yoga pants-and-North Face fleece-wearing girls into a social media frenzy (…because, if you don’t tell everyone you know on Facebook and Twitter that you love Beyoncé, do you really love her?). This hysteria caused one Towson University girl to send an instantly regrettable e-mail to a professor that she will not be attending class in honor of “the Goddess that is Queen Beyonce Knowles Carter’s birthday.”
Realizing just how big of a whoopsie she pulled, she tweeted this:
My dumbass was trying to save it to drafts and I accidentally sent it, I’m so embarrassed my professor probably thinks I’m mf crazy now!!!!
— Your Poundcake. (@michonjanieceIV) September 4, 2014
Yes. The professor probably does think you’re a fucking idiot. Because you are.
If she actually went through with it and skipped class, I’ve never hoped more for a professor to instantly flunk someone.
I want more like this!
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