First, let’s pat ourselves on the back. Anyone who was personally victimized by these articles was accepted to Columbia — snaps for us!
Putting aside all references to Ivy-elitism that will inevitably appear in some anonymous comment section, we all applied to a highly sought-after school, and we all succeeded. We were able to demonstrate our academic, social, and athletic fortitude to some degree.
In a society that puts so much emphasis on attending a college, why not pull out all the stops? You know, “Smoke if you got ‘em”? In your language: y u mock, bro?
So, you got into college? Congratulations, Bro. Gold stars for everyone.