Every week celebrities go on Twitter and speak their minds. Sometimes they’re funny, sometimes they’re thought-provoking, and sometimes we don’t know what they’re talking about. This list is all of that and more. Strap in. It could get bumpy.
My new favorite word of the Olympics – "twizzle"
— Kaley Cuoco Sweeting (@KaleyCuoco) February 17, 2014
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It’s everyone’s favorite word now.
Wow. Strippers get angry if you make it rain Bitcoins.
— Conan O'Brien (@ConanOBrien) February 17, 2014
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Good to know.
After you have sex, do u talk with ur partner or do u just post comments on each others fb page ?
— Judah Friedlander (@JudahWorldChamp) February 17, 2014
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21st century relationships…
I wish somebody would kidnap Liam Neeson already.
— Jeff Ross (@realjeffreyross) February 17, 2014
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Don’t worry, that’s his next film.
Me: "Could you please wait a second?"
8 yo daughter: "No. I have a waiting disorder."
— Andy Richter (@AndyRichter) February 17, 2014
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Genius.
Today on 'The View' Barbara Walters talked about how she uses a vibrator. Happy President's Day!
— Jenny Johnson (@JennyJohnsonHi5) February 17, 2014
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She really did. *shudder*
If I was blind I could tell who the hot girls in the nail salon were by how boring their stories are
— Mindy Kaling (@mindykaling) February 18, 2014
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Is this true, ladies?
Why I love Olympics: Ice dancing starts, I hate ice dancing. Ice dancing ends, ice dancing is the best!
— Seth Meyers (@sethmeyers) February 18, 2014
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The feelings expressed by millions.
So honored to be a part of #SISwim50!! #ohitsabeautifulmorning pic.twitter.com/DY63Kbfj7Z
— Alex Morgan (@alexmorgan13) February 18, 2014
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Presented without comment.
Yay! @SI_Swimsuit 2014 is live! Vote for #ROTY online now! pic.twitter.com/b8yrdYqJsb
— Emily Ratajkowski (@emrata) February 18, 2014
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No comment necessary.
Olympic figure skating was exquisite, yesterday. There's something about a beautiful woman and her gay companion that is just so right! ;^D
— Jim Carrey (@JimCarrey) February 18, 2014
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Ummm…want to take the one back, Jim?
.@si_swimsuit 50th anniversary!!! Photo by the amazing Raphael Mazzucco! #siswim50 pic.twitter.com/pGPizwDFnn
— Anne V (@AnneV) February 18, 2014
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Again, no comment necessary.
so happy to be in the @SI_Swimsuit issue! shot in New jersey by @WattsUpPhoto! its out!!!!! pic.twitter.com/A3w6oWzomj
— Sara Sampaio (@Sara_Sampaio) February 18, 2014
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Okay, one comment: wow.
…. The president has seen my boobs pic.twitter.com/I5BRXOl1UO
— Alexandra Daddario (@AADaddario) February 18, 2014
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Yes, yes he has.
Not going to do any of what my wife asked me to do today because everything we own is in my name.
— Michael Ian Black (@michaelianblack) February 18, 2014
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Let us know how that works out for you.
Check out http://t.co/aYrXj08Pkb! @si_swimsuit #siswim50 @jamesmacari @mj_day @peterbutlerhair @tracymurphymua pic.twitter.com/GrzPkYwNJV
— Nina Agdal (@NinaAgdal) February 18, 2014
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Yes, ma’am.
Orgullosa de ser #SIRookie la revista @SportIllustrated #SiSwim50 ser la única latina! Claro #Dominicana pic.twitter.com/pQt1EYROmE
— Cris Urena (@CrisUrena) February 18, 2014
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What she said.
At any given time I'm thinking, "what the fuck is this"
— Kat Dennings (@OfficialKat) February 19, 2014
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You and me both, Kat.
Too much America
— Albert Breer (@AlbertBreer) February 19, 2014
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NEVER!
Before LinkedIn I didn't know any strangers.
— Joshua Malina (@JoshMalina) February 19, 2014
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It’s a whole new world we live in now.
REMINDER: wash under your tits
— Andy Richter (@AndyRichter) February 19, 2014
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Sage advice.
I have a device capable of accessing the entirety of world-wide knowledge of mankind, and I use it to look at cats and argue with strangers.
— RUTH BUZZI (@Ruth_A_Buzzi) February 20, 2014
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Don’t forget the porn.
my platform for president 2016 includes: tax all churches, end their sexist government handouts-welfare used 2 kill women's health care.
— Roseanne Barr (@TheRealRoseanne) February 20, 2014
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Seems like a solid plan.
The figure skating scoring system is the worst in sports. Confusing to public, no accountability makes it worse than boxing.
— darren rovell (@darrenrovell) February 20, 2014
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Man ain’t lying.
Another hot new pic by @shannonjankula #mua @chousner pic.twitter.com/Rzjjhir5It
— Jesse Jane (@jessejane) February 20, 2014
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We approve of this tweet.
Giraffe Tits #BadOlympicEvents
— The Iron Sheik (@the_ironsheik) February 20, 2014
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Have a great weekend, everybody!