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25 crazy celebrity workouts and diets

By / 05.22.13
25 crazy celebrity workouts and diets

<a href="http://www.eonline.com/videos/204634/after-lately-kate-beckinsale-s-tight-bod" target="_blank">E!</a>


Ever wonder how your favorite celebs drop weight for movie roles? Wanna know how much gym time they put in for killer abs? Well, many of them resort to workouts and diets that are just plain disgusting. Here are some of the craziest.

25 Marilyn Monroe, raw eggs in milk



Everyone’s favorite sex symbol had a breakfast ritual that included milk with two raw eggs. She later died of salmonella. I maybe made that up.

24 Megan Fox, Apple Cider Vinegar



If apple cider vinegar gives you breasts like that, then we should secretly inject it into tampons and pads.

23 Adriana Lima, protein shake bonanza

Adriana Lima VS

<a href="http://www.shutterstock.com/pic-93954064/stock-photo-new-york-november-victoria-s-secret-fashion-model-adriana-lima-walks-the-runway-during-the.html?src=csl_recent_image-1" target="_blank">Adriana Lima Image</a> by Anton Oparin/Shutterstock




Before a Victoria’s Secret show, Adriana Lima rids herself of all solid food in favor of protein shakes. That’s it. Nothing except vitamins and protein. Bet her farts smell like roses.

22 Kate Beckinsale, yoga master



To prepare for her role in Underworld Awakening, Kate Beckinsale worked out 7 days a week. And she did a lot of yoga. And here is a GIF of her bending over.

21 Mariah Carey, bleak diet



Mariah keeps her voluptuous figure by eating foods with no salt, spices or sugar. That’s a crappy way to go about life. I’d rather be fat and ugly. Snooki, care to weigh in here?

205 Mel B, workout sex



Mel B once told George Lopez that she keeps in shape by having sex five times a day. This should be the workout for everyone, everywhere. Except kids and virgins.

19 Gwyneth Paltrow, two liters of water a day



Hey you guys, remember when that one publication named Gwyneth Paltrow the most beautiful woman in the world. Yea, that was funny. Perhaps she reached the pinnacle of beauty because she drinks two liters of water a day? Or because she only eats quinoa. Who knows. Gwyneth is so much smarter than the rest of us so we should bow to her infinite wisdom.

18 Elizabeth Hurley, watercress soup diet



You know how they say milk does a body good. Well, watercress does breasts good. Just ask Elizabeth Hurley who swears by a vitamin rich soup packed with watercress, onions and this sounds gross already.

17 Demi Moore-raw food diet



Whatever Demi Moore’s doing seems to work. If that means eating raw foods with a healthy side of botox, so be it. Botulism never hurt anyone.

16 Jennifer Aniston, baby food diet



To prepare for her role in Just Go With It, Aniston ate 14 portions of pureed baby food a day…and I just threw up in my mouth.

15 Renee Zellweger, ice cube diet



Renne Zellweger keeps her figure by getting drunk and chewing on ice cubes. It gives her the sensation of eating without actually eating. Judging from this GIF, she also does drugs. Lots of them. But that’s a whole other diet.

14 Beyonce, colonic irrigation

Beyonce celebrity diet

IMGUR




Colonic irrigation involves fluid sent into your anus, also referred to as Friday night by the looser ladies.

13 Nicole Kidman, hard boiled egg diet



When Kidman wants to shed some weight she goes with one egg for breakfast, one for lunch and two for dinner. If she’s feeling extra spicy that day she’ll add another egg. What’s that? Somebody farted. No, that’s just Nicole’s breath.

12 Jennifer Lopez, grapefruit diet

CBS

CBS




To curb her appetite, J-Lo sniffs grapefruit extract. Jenny from the block would not approve of this diva shit.

11 Christian Bale, tuna and an apple

Guyism Composite

Guyism Composite




Tuna and apples go together like peanut butter and jelly, amirite? Bale used the combo for 3 straight months to drop weight. And “I’m Batman.”

10 Kim Catrall, fish 3 times a day



Kim Catrall of Sex and the City fame eats fish 3 times a day. It’s a natural way to give yourself a facelift. This is just another reminder that people in Hollywood are stupid.

9 Sarah Michelle Gellar, cabbage soup



You know what’s disgusting? The cabbage soup diet. You know what’s not disgusting? Sarah Michelle Gellar. I’m torn here.

8 Christina Aguilera, 7 day color diet



7 days, 7 colors—white, red, green, orange purple, yellow and then you mix all of them together on that last day and I can’t believe people adhere to this shit. But hey, nice moves Christina.

7 Natalie Portman, Black Swan workout



Natalie Portman worked out 5-8 hours a day for an entire year to prepare for Black Swan. She’s also a vegan. She’s also the perfect woman but I digress.

6 Jake Gyllenhaal, parkour



Gyllenhaal went through a grueling parkour boot camp for his role in Prince of Persia. Parkour is basically walking and jumping in extreme fashion. Fat camp sounds more fun.

5 Anne Hathaway, dried oatmeal paste

Anne Hathaway

NBC




To make herself look deathly anorexic in Les Miserables, Anne Hathaway ate two thin squares of dried oatmeal paste a day. I don’t know what oatmeal paste is and frankly, I’m not sure I want to.

4 January Jones, placenta diet

YouTube/AMC

<a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qfBIU1x5cI8" target="_blank">YouTube</a>/<a href="http://www.amctv.com/shows/mad-men" target="_blank">AMC</a>




Nope, not even gonna explain this one. I heard the story of Tom Cruise eating placenta and I’ve yet to recover.

3 Steve Harvey, 21 pounds in 21 days

CBS

CBS




Steve Harvey’s 21 pounds in 21 days is a fancy way of saying he used a juicing diet. Fruit and veggies that is, not steroids. Though I believe the latter would also give you results.

2 Victoria Beckham, facial yoga



Victoria Beckham was notorious for telling the Spice Girls what to eat and how much to work out. She recently added facial yoga to her repertoire. Facial yoga is something a crazy lady made up because her face broke into a sweat yelling at her husband. I didn’t make that up. That’s fact. Look it up.

1 Gerard Butler, 300 workout



I’m simply going to post this and then pass out: “Butler performs 25 pullups, 50 deadlifts with 135 pounds, 50 pushups, 50 jumps on a 24-inch box, 50 floor wipers (*3), 50 single-arm clean-and-presses using a 36-pound kettle bell, and 25 more pullups.”



(Previously published on May 22, 2013.)


TAGSAdriana LimaAngelica CarreraAnne HathawayArbitrary RankingsBeyoncecelebrity dietcelebrity workoutChristian BaleChristina Aguilera dietcrazy celebrity dietDemi MoorefeaturedGerard ButlerGwyneth PaltrowJake GyllenhaalJanuary JonesJennifer AnistonKate BeckinsaleKim CatrellListsMariah CareyMarilyn MonroeMegan FoxMel BNatalie PortmanNicole KidmanRenee ZellweggerSarah Michelle GellarSteve HarveyVictoria Beckham
A. Isaac
About A. Isaac... A. Isaac is the Senior Editor of Guyism.com. He's a buffet connoisseur and regularly eats until he passes out. He also advocates pushing over children to catch foul balls.

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