Just wondering which degree you bros thought carry more standing in the workplace: A degree from a NESCAC or equivalent liberal arts school or a good public school like Michigan, UVA, UNC, Berkeley etc I know it...  Keep Reading »

What would you consider to be the most bro job out there? Or, would not having a job be the most bro? I work in the pro shop at a golf course, I'd say thats pretty bro, but can easily be outdone.  Keep Reading »

I mean some of my friends think it's really cool to just suck on a huge cock so i was wondering what everyone thought of this. Personally i think it's an interesting hobby and i'm indifferent. But guy on guy blow...  Keep Reading »

Roughly 6 months ago, the economy was tanking, jobs were being snatched from our grasps at record paces, and I had about 20 less women under my distinguished belt. Those, Officer Friday, are just the facts.

Today, even though the market is bouncing back and there seems to be more jobs, there are still people out of work or being laid off everyday. Amazingly, my sexual economy hasn't slowed down and I somehow managed to remain employed even though I can't possibly be any less affable or underachieve anymore at my job. My family is even astonished by my gainful employment.

Each day, throughout this great country, men and women go to their jobs, worrying whether or not their livelihood is going to be stolen from them. Stolen without cause or regard for their well-being -- much like the way I go about romancing a woman, I might add. In my humblest of opinions, I think all this worrying is being done in vain. I have come to realize that no matter the level of effort you choose to convey, dumb luck is probably the only reason you are still employed, or not. After all, if history has taught us anything, it's that everyone, aside from the guy with the thickest shaft in the porn industry, is expendable.

If you have fallen on hard times take a moment and realize that this is not your fault. You are still awesome, and, in my opinion, the blame should fall solely on the CEO or anyone else who makes more money than you. Why is that? I don't have a definitive answer, but I can tell you with a great deal of certainty that it's not the fault of Joan from Accounts Receivables that no one wants to buy the stupid product that the CEO signed off on. Is it? Sure Joan can be off-putting at times and forces coworkers into conversations about how her cat is her soul mate, but Joan is 58 years old, single, and has a face that looks like a peeled orange; give her a fucking break, ya jerk. Blame that bitch for your sleep apnea, but she, much like the countless other who have been let go, certainly isn't the reason that the company's stock price has hit a 30-year low.

So if your boss gave you your walkin' papers (like ugly ass Joan), here are a few nifty ways to get back on your feet or to just enjoy your unemployed days.

(Note: You'll notice that I have left out doing drugs, drinking, and masturbating. You should be doing those if you are employed and even more so if you are not. If your father didn't tell you that when you were a child, then shame on him.)

1. Collect Unemployment
Consider this milking of the governments' tit for the next 13 months early retribution for the Social Security you will never receive in retirement. Remember that you are only eligible to collect if you lose your job due to lay-offs or something similar. So if you try to embezzle money or you posterize your boss's face with your fist, Uncle Sam won't open his blouse and let you suck on those sweet pepperoni-shaped nipples of his.  Keep Reading »