This is the latest installment of Ask A Bro with Waffles McButter. Got a question of your own for Waffles? Email wafflesmcbutter@brobible.com. You can also now follow Waffles on Twitter or be his friend on Facebook.

Waffles,

My bros and I were discussing some horror stories in the bedroom and we were wondering what is the worst thing a guy could do in bed that would totally ruin it with a chick?

Thanks,
CuBro19  Keep Reading »

Editor's Note: This piece ran early last week, but we thought we'd reissue it today, just in time for Valentine's Day weekend.

This is the latest installment of Ask A Bro with Waffles McButter. Got a question of your own for Waffles? Email wafflesmcbutter@brobible.com. You can also now follow Waffles on Twitter or be his friend on Facebook.

Dear Waffles,

Valentine's Day is right around the corner. Do you have any advice for all of us single bros who don't want to take some random out to dinner but still want to tear it up?

Respect,
Chayvid Hasselhoff  Keep Reading »

Editor's Note: This piece ran early last week, but we thought we'd reissue it today, just in time for Valentine's Day weekend.

This is the latest installment of Ask A Bro with Waffles McButter. Got a question of your own for Waffles? Email wafflesmcbutter@brobible.com. You can also now follow Waffles on Twitter or be his friend on Facebook.

Dear Waffles,

Valentine's Day is right around the corner. Do you have any advice for all of us single bros who don't want to take some random out to dinner but still want to tear it up?

Respect,
Chayvid Hasselhoff  Keep Reading »

A song, written by a real sad sap in the mid 1900s, once said that "breakin' up is hard to do." As simple as that song may be, I'm not sure if truer words have ever been spoken. Whether you are the recipient of the fatal blow or you are the one drop kicking your lover's heart off an overpass, no one likes breaking up. We love the outcome, that's for sure, but the act itself is oftentimes more excruciating than having a pickle jar forced up your ass -- or so my grandma tells me.

Breakups are a part of life and they can happen to anyone. When a relationship breaks, the sex starts to suck, or the sight of your girlfriend makes you wish you lost both eyes in a fireworks accident, it's time for a change. In some instances, we break up with girls without cause or good reason. Although, I would argue that yearning to stick our filthy dicks into some strange pussy is as good of a reason as any to toss your 10-cent floozy of a girlfriend, who fucks like a dead fish, to the curb. Wouldn't you?

In order to make future breakups as pain free as possible, I have come up with 10 easy to follow guidelines that will allow you to keep your sanity once you recklessly chuck some broad's heart into oncoming traffic.  Keep Reading »

This is the latest installment of Ask A Bro with Waffles McButter. Got a question of your own for Waffles? Email wafflesmcbutter@brobible.com. You can also now follow Waffles on Twitter or be his friend on Facebook.

Dear Waffles,

First off, you are an inspiration. However, I will cut to the chase. I'm chilling with my bro and we are deciding whether fucking an albino chick is +2 bro points or -2 bro points based on rarity alone. Second, which is more bro? Pool or golf?

Much brospect,
Carpenter  Keep Reading »

This is the latest installment of Ask A Bro with Waffles McButter. Got a question of your own for Waffles? Email wafflesmcbutter@brobible.com. You can also now follow Waffles on Twitter or be his friend on Facebook.

Dear Waffles,

I recently started seeing this pretty sexy chick. I like her a lot, but there is one drawback: She has a two-year-old kid. I am 24 years old and I don't know whether to continue on or break it off before it gets serious.

Regards,
Kosher Kawk

Bro,

I have thought about this for over an hour and it is literally tearing me apart that I can't find a loophole as to how abortion would still be plausible. Every time I think I have a viable solution, all signs wind up pointing to homicide and the subsequent life sentence or execution that would be attached. So that sucks.  Keep Reading »

This is the latest installment of Ask A Bro with Waffles McButter. Got a question of your own for Waffles? Email wafflesmcbutter@brobible.com. You can also now follow Waffles on Twitter or be his friend on Facebook.

Waffles,

Recently, my bros and I have been discussing whether or not it is bro to listen to country music. I mean, most songs are about getting wasted with your boys, fucking a girl for the first time, or any other bro-like activity. And nothing's better than blasting Kenny Chesney on your way down the shore for the weekend while packing a bomb and rocking a sweet flat brim. Please advise me and my bros whether or not it is truly bro to listen to country music.

Sincerely,
Kenny Chaysney  Keep Reading »

This is the latest installment of Ask A Bro with Waffles McButter. Got a question of your own for Waffles? Email wafflesmcbutter@brobible.com. You can also now follow Waffles on Twitter or be his friend on Facebook.

Dear Waffles McButter,

First and foremost I would like to admit my innate yearning for you to one day be mine. I know that's a little fucked up, but I'd like to imagine that behind the waffle there is a guy that would completely ravish my body and do things to me otherwise unimaginable to even my deepest, naughtiest fantasies. Now I can completely accept if you choose not to answer my question as you may feel as though you should not divulge said information to a girl. However, please trust me when I say that your insight will only provide quality, meaningless sex for bros in the area.

Here's my conundrum:  Keep Reading »

This is the latest installment of Ask A Bro with Waffles McButter. Got a question of your own for Waffles? Email wafflesmcbutter@brobible.com. You can also now follow Waffles on Twitter or be his friend on Facebook.

Dear Waffles,

Are the are any sexual acts that a girl should refrain from with a guy if your planning on dating him? One of my friends claims that you should never have anal sex if you plan on being someone's girlfriend. What sexual acts if any would you say fall into this category?

Sincerely,
Hesitant  Keep Reading »

This is the latest installment of Ask A Bro with Waffles McButter. Got a question of your own for Waffles? Email wafflesmcbutter@brobible.com. You can also now follow Waffles on Twitter or be his friend on Facebook.

Oh Bro my Bro,

My Bros and I have a debate on our hands. We've been arguing for some time about who is the Bro's biggest threat or enemy. As a fellow Bro of caliber, I'm sure you know the amount of "Bro-hate" directed toward us Bros day and night. Whether it be from douchebags, cock-blocks, vagina shields, "gangstazzz," Ed Hardy-wearing ass nuggets, the sensitive guy with the guitar and drum circle playing some bullshit song about his lack in the sack, a shitty Xbox live connection, or the ever present, ever threatening STDs, which can linger in the most desirable of cooch. I ask of YOU who is the Bowser to our Mario... The Capone to our Ness?

JoeBro...Flow  Keep Reading »

This is the latest installment of Ask A Bro with Waffles McButter. Got a question of your own for Waffles? Email wafflesmcbutter@brobible.com. You can also now follow Waffles on Twitter or be his friend on Facebook.

Waffles,

First of all, I love what you have to say, you're the insight of a generation. That being said, I figured you were the best person to come to with an issue. My bros and I have been going head-to-head for a week about what is less bro: grilling box or fucking her up the butt. I think it's pretty obvious but I figured if anyone could clear this up, it had to be you.

Keep it sticky,
Tony Hawk Bro Skater

Dearest Bro,

Consider the following:  Keep Reading »

This is the latest installment of Ask A Bro with Waffles McButter. Got a question of your own for Waffles? Email wafflesmcbutter@brobible.com. You can also now follow Waffles on Twitter or be his friend on Facebook.

Dear Waffles,

I'm trying to pick up this slammin' Australian chick. Do you have any advice for bro's trying to land international chicks?

Thanks.
ramBRO

Dear John J,

First I'd like to start by offering my long overdue condolences for your fallen brothers, especially Danforth, he was a good egg and a hell of a used-car salesman before the war. Nam' was fucking hell for all of us and I'm sure you miss him and the rest of your fallen platoon. But enough with all the fuckin' pleasantries; kindness makes me sick, Vietnam was years ago, and no bro should ever live in the past. So let's talk about the mission at hand and how you can bag and tag this Australian bird without spiking her drink with cyanide or the use of sweet Napalm.  Keep Reading »

This is the latest installment of Ask A Bro with Waffles McButter. Got a question of your own for Waffles? Email wafflesmcbutter@brobible.com. You can also now follow Waffles on Twitter or be his friend on Facebook.

Waffles,
Me and my bros were debating something the other day. Is there such a thing as bad Flow? Some cited the mullet as in bad taste, hillbilly, and abuse of cabbage. Others said all lettuce is great, let the good times flow. I myself am not sure; maybe you can clear this up for the bro-nation.

Respectfully,
Chaymie LangenBroner  Keep Reading »

This is the latest installment of Ask A Bro with Waffles McButter. Got a question of your own for Waffles? Email wafflesmcbutter@brobible.com. You can also now follow Waffles on Twitter or be his friend on Facebook.

Bros, I need your help again so please chime in. This question isn't exactly my realm of expertise. Also, if any of you know Chris Brown or a psychic that can summon Ike Turner from the grave, give them a call because I think this topic might give those boys a boner.

Yo Waffles,

My new girlfriend is an absolute freak in bed. I am not complaining but she isn't just horny, she wants me to strangle her during sex and she likes it violent. I haven't been with a girl like this in my life, and I'm not sure I am comfortable with the whole choking thing. What should I do?

Respect,
Kosher Kawk

Bro,

My animal instincts are telling me to offer you one piece of advice while my conscious is pleading with me to go in another direction. This is a tough call, but since I haven't listened to my conscious in quite some time, I'll go the beast route.  Keep Reading »

This is the latest installment of Ask A Bro with Waffles McButter. Got a question of your own for Waffles? Email wafflesmcbutter@brobible.com. You can also now follow Waffles on Twitter or be his friend on Facebook.

This inquiry came in last night and it wasn't addressed only to me, but to the entire Bro-nation. Although I will still offer my three and a half scents, I hope that all you bros out there can chime in to help out your fellow man. It will only take a moment of your time and lord knows you can ignore whatever else it is that you are doing for another minute. So stop pretending to do work, be late to your class, or put off your morning hand job for a few moments.

Fellow bros,

I have a serious issue. I'm a freshman now and I'm at college with a girl that I was good friends with in high school. She's really hot and knows a lot of people. I'm stuck in the friend zone and I'm afraid she might get picked up by some upperclassmen. I think she's been dropping a few hints but I don't want to ruin this because we've been really good friends for a long time. Any advice to a fellow bro?

Sincerely,
JL  Keep Reading »