The Top 10 Types of Guys in a Strip Club
by Nina Kaplan | January 25, 2010 - 10:57am | 21 comments - 109 reads2. Fetish Frank He sits at the edge of the stage with a look in his eye that is hungrier than other guys. The word gets passed around in the dressing room, "Frank wants to suck your shoe." Most guys want to fuck to girls -- Frank wants to fuck feet. Or armpit. Or he wants to get fucked. As in, "Fuck you Frank. You're a fucking loser." I always wonder how Frank got so fucked up. 3. Jack & Jill Jill giggles as she sits in a corner with her boyfriend Jack. "You like girls?" Jack asks as I pass. "Dance for my girlfriend." Jill turns pink and giggles some more as I suggestively wave my ass in her face. Jack and Jill are looking for Little Miss Muffet so they could eat her. 4. Hymie Hassid And on the seventh day, Hymie rested in a strip club, had a Heineken, and got a hard-on. [inline:slimy] 5. Sad Dad Sad Dad wants you to have a drink with him so he could tell you all about his divorce and show you pictures of his kids whom he never gets to see. He hasn't had sex in a year and his mom is dying and he just turned 46 and he just got laid off and he's going to therapy to heal his inner child. 6. Brad and Bernie's Best Bromance Brad wants you to dance for Bernie. Bernie wants you to dance for Brad. They're best buds. They drink Bud. They watch the game. They talk up girls. They should be conjoined twins. 7. Sammy and the Seven Dwarfs Also known as the Bachelor Party. Lessee, there's Happy, Horny, Bashful, Grumpy, Doc, Dopey, and Dickhead. And they all want to fuck Sammy up. It's vindictive, actually, a blood sport. See Sammy drink his sixtieth shot. See Sammy go through an assembly line of lap dances. See Sammy get picked on and pelted with peanuts. By the end of the night, Sammy can't wait to get married so his wife can protect him from those evil dwarfs. 8. Norman Bates He's quiet. Really quiet. So you're surprised when he slips you a five and asks you to sit with him. He buys you a drink. He doesn't look at you. He tells you the place has changed since he was last here. Five years ago. Before he went to jail. For killing his mother. And his sister. And his girlfriend. And his little dog. He's a nice guy, really. 9. Grandpa Bill He's 93 and he has hardly any hair and hardly any natural teeth, but he still gets a hard on. His rumpled suit has grease stains and dates from 1975. The girl sitting with him could be his great-granddaughter and she's trying to ignore his hand, which has a way of creeping up her knee. 10. Sting 'Nuff said.
women aren’t funny, why are they writing on a site for Bros
agreed 100%
Wow, you posted this?
I hope she didn’t leave the kitchen to write this
All I know is I better smell dinner cooking when I come home…
Was this supposed to be extremely unfunny? If so, then great job!
Reading this was like allowing a little brother tell a long and elaborate joke… which was of course not entertaining or humorous
I normally enjoy everything about strip clubs and strippers, this was extremely dissapointing
Exhibit A of girls not having any wit at all. This is bad.
This just confirms to me that you guys are fags. Sweet way to ruin the term bro by using it constantly and being jabroni’s all at the same time. Think about it.
Yet you still post on OUR website… your just a bro-hater. Why you gotta go break down and over-analyze bro’s? Clearly we’re smarter and better than you for three reasons: 1. Bro’s are the smartest people in the world. 2. Your a stripper, you probably have gotten fucked by me and my grandpa. 3. You’re a stripper who hates on the bro’s that throw cash for jiggling your ass.
Bros Rule
norman bates wasnt bad, everything else was common street trash
This was ok, not really all that funny but the last one #10 Sting. You said “Nuff said” well maybe it’s me but I don’t get it so there should be a little more said
Didn’t really get the “Sting - nuff said” part. Unfunny overall, perhaps could use more tits?
TITS OR GTFO
Yes and boys are Boys, boys, boys. You are all BOYS!!! Will you ever become men? Probably not-I don’t think any of you are bright enough to complete the development away from adolescence. Oh. . . why don’t you all just go and slit your wrists it’ll lower your blood pressure.
Can someone throw this slut a maxi pad or an oven
maybe just stick to stripping eh nina?
Wasn’t too bad… I mean, I gotta admit, it is very accurate… I had a cousin who stripped. Meh,
eat poo RIGHT
this really wasn’t that funny. especially the part about the sad dad. i’m all about ripping on people, but something like that is just incredibly depressing.