
The best part of last night's "Hard Knocks" episode was the back-and-forth between Ocho Cinco and his girlfriend Maya (anyone got a pic? we can't find one) about how the two met. If you're having trouble getting girls' phone numbers, let Ocho Cinco show you the way. Here's the running dialogue:
Chad: This is how we met, New Orleans, All-Star Weekend, and all of a sudden I hear this girl out of nowhere be like excuse me, are you, what's your name? And I give her that look like, psst.
Maya: No, that's not what happened... No it wasn't. You chased me.
(Chad puts hits hands together in a T.)
Maya: Timeout? You chased me.
Chad: Time. Pause.
Maya: You didn't got on a wheel chair and pretend you were a cripple so you could sit next to me at the airplane? And then, as soon as you got on the airplane, you said, "Ah, Jesus thank you, I'm saved, it's a miracle, I can walk." You didn't say that?
Chad: That's not how it happened. Man, for real, people y'all know me--
Maya: And then, while I was sleeping...
Chad: Excuse me--
Maya: ...You took my phone and dialed your number and then I didn't even know and then you put on your earphones on and didn't hear anything I said because you already got my number.
Chad: Anyway, for the men, this is a new way how to get phone numbers now so you don't have to deal with rejection/ You take the women's phone, you ask to borrow it, you tell her your phone is dead at that present time, you dial your number with her phone and you just call her later on or text her. It might be some kind of stalkerish stuff biut it helps with the rejection process, you don't have to deal with being turned down. As in my case I did that, and now I can't---
Maya: Get rid of me?
Chad: Get rid of you. Can we go work out please?