The 5 Lamest, Most Hilarious Music Videos of the 1980s
by Handsome B. Wonderful | August 4, 2009 - 7:04am | 0 comments - 17 reads"I Wish I Had a Girl" by Henry Lee Summer The song presents a dilemma many bros have encountered. Despite their best efforts, they can't find that special someone. Mr. Summer's solution is to stalk and accost a collection of women with a persistence that borders on sexual assault. Somehow, that repellent behavior doesn't bother the smitten young woman who follows and laughs at his repeated efforts. Aside from the fact that if you squint, Summer's eventual lady love looks uncomfortably like him, why was she following him? Ugh. I feel like I'm watching a Todd Solondz movie. Let's move on. [inline:todd] "Rock Me Tonite" by Billy Squier I find it amazing that this actually happened. Squier was one of the biggest rock stars of the early 1980s, a macho guy who played guitar-heavy anthems like "Lonely is the Night" and "The Stroke." Enter director Kenny Ortega (the man who choreographed "Dirty Dancing"), who allowed Squier to prance around like Bob Fosse and Truman Capote's love child, and ruin his career. Answers.com describes "Rock Me Tonite" as "one of the most inadvertently hilarious videos of all time." Yeah, that'll do. [inline:rockme] "Lady (You Bring Me Up)" by The Commodores I'm willing to bet the cost of shooting was around $150, most of it for the girls' make-up and box lunches. The park was free. The community center donated the soccer ball. The referee had just done a pee-wee scrimmage. The girls were on loan from Jack Horner's latest film. Even the Commodores saved time and money, creating their dance routine at the craft services table, along with the concept and storyline for the video. Also, if you thought women's fashion was awful in the 1980s, check out what the boys from Tuskegee are wearing. I swear their shorts are more skimpy than the women's. [inline:commodore] "How Can I Fall" by Breathe Not only does it look like the world's most expensive deodorant commercial, it has a storyline constructed by an eight year old: "O.K., so there's this wedding... Or maybe it's an outdoor cafe. I don't really know. And they're lots of beautiful people there. And there's a stick-ball game. Someone gets angry. And then the one greasy-haired guy gets with the poofy-haired girl. Or maybe she leaves him. Oh, yeah, then it starts raining." [inline:fall]
