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Who Needs Monogamy? Six Tips for the (Very) Casual Dater

[inline:girls] I love pizza. All kinds. Especially, a thin crust topped with pineapple. But, if I had to eat it every night I'd get bored of it. Soon my boredom would morph into anger, followed by resentment, and pretty soon I'd start to hate the very thing that I once loved. That's kind of why I find fault with monogamy. Humans, like most mammals, are not wired to be monogamous. According to scientific research, out of over 4,000 mammalian species, only beavers and a couple of other rodents, otters, bats, certain foxes, and a few hoofed mammals are actually classified as monogamous. Why is it that we group men and women in the same category as otters? Hell, even rattlesnakes know better than to spend their entire life with only one other snake. Is it time that we ignore this notion of coupling off in favor of our genetic predisposition of promiscuity? Would your life be better if you had more than one girlfriend? It seems to work well enough for Hugh Heffner. Although interestingly enough, Heffner's 18-year-old son, Marston, has no desire to follow in his father's romantic footsteps, claiming, "I'm not going to have multiple girlfriends -- not at the same time. I can't imagine that." Still, there are plenty of Bros that could imagine that. During an interview last year with vibe.com, Akon revealed his feelings towards polygamy by saying, "I think the average guy is doing [it] right now. He's just not married. Everybody that I hang with got multiple girlfriends." While fans were all up and arms about Akon's Big Love-ish beliefs, at the end of the day, maybe the idea of engaging in multiple relationships should not be such a fantasy after all? That said, Bros, there is definitely a right and wrong way to date more than one woman at the same time. With this in mind, I've complied a list of suggestions:

1. Try to date women with the same name. There are plenty of cute girls with common names such as Jennifer, Jessica, and Sarah at your local watering hole or college campus. While dating two girls may sound confusing, in actually, this tactic will make your life much easier because you'll never call out the wrong name, especially during the heat of the moment. If dating similarly named women isn't a possibility, at least give them both the same nickname, like Pooky. 2. Don't promise exclusivity with either girl. And be aware that they might be dating other guys as well. If both girls seem content with a casual sexual arrangement, you may even be able to entice them to have a threesome. 3. Even if she is aware that you are not being monogamous, maintain a "don't ask, don't tell policy" when it comes to each other's bedroom behavior. You would not want to hear about how loudly another guy makes her scream, so keep your sexual details to yourself as well. If she suggests getting together on the same day when you have plans with another girl, don't lie, simply say, "I already have plans," and move on. Chances are, she'll get the hint. 4. At some point, the inevitable question of "Where are we going with this?" will ultimately arise. To avoid leading anyone on, simply be upfront and state that you are not looking for a relationship. You might want to throw in, "But I'm not sure what I'll want in the future," to soften the blow. 5. Don't let either girl leave personal belongings at your place. Though she may claim that she just wants to leave face wash in your bathroom to remove her make-up, really, she's trying to mark her territory. 6. Wrap it up. If you are planning on having sex with more than one partner, in the words of Steve Martin in "Father of the Bride," "Don't forget to buckle your condom." Ultimately, my problem with the concept of the monogamy stems from the belief that one relationship is supposed to leave you utterly fulfilled. People are not static creatures. Our desires change as we ourselves continue to evolve. One of the perks of dating multiple women is the opportunity to experience different connections and fulfill different emotional needs. While one woman may be more playful, another may challenge you intellectually. Above all, enjoy casually dating now Bros, because in the words of the writer Erica Jong, "We are finally driven to monogamy not by morality, but by exhaustion."

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